Translation Review: [Aidoru] Rozen Maiden (2013) – 01

B-Tier, Fansub Review, Translation Review — By on July 6, 2013 7:22 pm

This post was written by kokujin-kun. He is not Dark_Sage.


So Aidoru decided to oversub a show without even finishing the last show they were working on. Classic.

Table of Contents

Release Information

Translation

Other Observations

Final Grade

Release Information

Episode details.

Release format: MKV (433 MB, 10-bit)

Wap Level: Standard: Eastern name order, honorifics (if used),

English style: British English.

Speed: Quick (<48 hours)

 

External links.

Group website: http://aidoru.circle-47.com/

IRC channel: #[email protected]

Fansub.co screenshot comparisons:

Subbusu screenshot comparisons:

 

Translation

Karaoke.

[Aidoru] Rozen Maiden (2013) [720p] - 01 [FC8B3F0B].mkv_snapshot_02.17_[2013.07.06_16.48.47]

Apparently my computer isn’t fucked and this is actually what they WANTED their karaoke to look like. In any case, even if we assume they haven’t misheard any lyrics, the English translation is also fucked. I’m not going to waste time and point out everything that is wrong with each line. All you need to do is step back and look at the song as a whole. Who is singing it? Who are they singing it to? The answers to those questions is of course “Shinku” and “Jun.” Unfortunately, their translations don’t even reflect the general idea of how the song is supposed to be received.

[Aidoru] Rozen Maiden (2013) [720p] - 01 [FC8B3F0B].mkv_snapshot_23.18_[2013.07.06_17.47.18]

ED. Same goddamn font. I guess they really wanted an Asian font so they can add some Japanese characters pretty much none of the leechers could read. They also really stuck to the dictionary for this song, but it’s passable.

 

Main Script.

[Aidoru] Rozen Maiden (2013) [720p] - 01 [FC8B3F0B].mkv_snapshot_03.38_[2013.07.06_17.04.59]

I like how they tried mixing it up a bit with this line, but I’m afraid it didn’t really express Jun’s bland disappointment.

[Aidoru] Rozen Maiden (2013) [720p] - 01 [FC8B3F0B].mkv_snapshot_05.30_[2013.07.06_17.10.53]

The leaves haven’t fully opened.

[Aidoru] Rozen Maiden (2013) [720p] - 01 [FC8B3F0B].mkv_snapshot_07.20_[2013.07.06_17.14.48]

They were each created from one of the seven Rosa Mystica fragments, but this line as it reads now does not reflect that fact.

[Aidoru] Rozen Maiden (2013) [720p] - 01 [FC8B3F0B].mkv_snapshot_11.42_[2013.07.06_17.43.58]

Sometimes they use honorifics…

[Aidoru] Rozen Maiden (2013) [720p] - 01 [FC8B3F0B].mkv_snapshot_21.14_[2013.07.06_17.43.35]

Sometimes they don’t.

[Aidoru] Rozen Maiden (2013) [720p] - 01 [FC8B3F0B].mkv_snapshot_12.01_[2013.07.06_17.29.55]

Another attempt to adapt her verbal tic to English. Personally, I’d probably begin every other line Kanaria says with “I think” instead of putting it at the end.

[Aidoru] Rozen Maiden (2013) [720p] - 01 [FC8B3F0B].mkv_snapshot_17.27_[2013.07.06_17.37.26]

The mom mum says, “Tomoe-san.”

[Aidoru] Rozen Maiden (2013) [720p] - 01 [FC8B3F0B].mkv_snapshot_19.41_[2013.07.06_17.41.11]

Scriptwriting FTW!

[Aidoru] Rozen Maiden (2013) [720p] - 01 [FC8B3F0B].mkv_snapshot_23.55_[2013.07.06_17.49.52]

“Saito-chan” here works at that book store. What would you call someone who’s paying you crap wages?

 

Other Observations

[Aidoru] Rozen Maiden (2013) [720p] - 01 [FC8B3F0B].mkv_snapshot_00.47_[2013.07.06_16.16.39]

Sign wasn’t motion-tracked, among other things.

[Aidoru] Rozen Maiden (2013) [720p] - 01 [FC8B3F0B].mkv_snapshot_01.09_[2013.07.06_16.17.53]

Logo font almost but doesn’t quite match the font the studio used. They could also try spacing out the letters more.

[Aidoru] Rozen Maiden (2013) [720p] - 01 [FC8B3F0B].mkv_snapshot_07.40_[2013.07.06_17.15.23]

1.) Fade starts too late, and 2.) Use fucking /t transform.

[Aidoru] Rozen Maiden (2013) [720p] - 01 [FC8B3F0B].mkv_snapshot_08.20_[2013.07.06_17.22.56][Aidoru] Rozen Maiden (2013) [720p] - 01 [FC8B3F0B].mkv_snapshot_08.22_[2013.07.06_17.23.26]

Don’t use /move.

[Aidoru] Rozen Maiden (2013) [720p] - 01 [FC8B3F0B].mkv_snapshot_08.26_[2013.07.06_17.21.06]

Don’t use /move.

[Aidoru] Rozen Maiden (2013) [720p] - 01 [FC8B3F0B].mkv_snapshot_23.58_[2013.07.06_17.51.10][Aidoru] Rozen Maiden (2013) [720p] - 01 [FC8B3F0B].mkv_snapshot_23.58_[2013.07.06_17.51.41]

For the love of God, don’t use /move.

[Aidoru] Rozen Maiden (2013) [720p] - 01 [FC8B3F0B].mkv_snapshot_10.00_[2013.07.06_17.27.20][Aidoru] Rozen Maiden (2013) [720p] - 01 [FC8B3F0B].mkv_snapshot_10.02_[2013.07.06_17.27.27]

I thought alpha timing stopped being cool back when Lunar folded.

 

Final Grade: B

Although it was pretty accurate, the script didn’t exactly impress me. Although they tried in a couple of places to dress up the script, one can easily tell they are reading a fan translation of Japanese media.

Three reviews is enough for today, so I’ll do Crunchyroll tomorrow, and then Evetaku once they released their final version of this episode.

 

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19 Comments

Aru says:

The main font sure is small, isn’t it?

kokujin-kun says:

Oh yeah, was going to comment on that too… oh well ┐( ̄ー ̄)┌

lygerzero0zero says:

What’s wrong with \move? :x

Nothing when the motion itself is linear. However, I’m going to guess that wasn’t the case here.

kokujin-kun says:

Okay, correction: if you DON’T know how to use /move, DON’T use /move :p

Chime says:

It works in some cases, such as when you just want to lower subtitles a bit to dodge the broadcast’s on-screen text announcement that’s sliding in.
For matching text in animation, the time-motion vector often isn’t constant, so a linear \move effect simply won’t match all the time. The subtitle format also only has millisecond temporal precision and on top of that, the video’s frame time interval also often only has millisecond precision per frame (which is not that great, as 24/1.001 fps for example is 41.7083333333333 ms).

lygerzero0zero says:

In my experience, \move is sufficient for 99% of constant speed pans. Never noticed a difference, and if I have 100 lines on screen at once, I sure as hell am going to hesitate before motion tracking a simple linear motion onto all 100 of them.

kokujin-kun says:

Yeah, but I still play it (relatively) safe and let Mocha estimate the /move formula for me [lazy mode]

lygerzero0zero says:

Pfft. I use the crosshairs for first approximation and then adjust the numbers manually.

Then again, I avoid typesetting whenever possible and just make other people do it. /o/

ar says:

By other people he means lua scripts! w

RDF2050 says:

I am sure he is talking about his staff(slaves)!

/me runs

Shoujo Q says:

Thanks for the feedback. Point taken on the “shop owner” and the honorifics – I wasn’t thorough enough and I’ll cop that.

However, the point about the “pieces of Rosa Mystica” is technically true either way – the Rosa Mystica is originally one object that is to be re-united with the rebirth as Alice of the doll who wins the Alice Game.

As for the OP lyrics – ALI PROJECT is weird and official lyrics will be along before the show is over, so these won’t be the lyrics used in the final release of the show anyway.

corocoro says:

Your line reads as if all the dolls were created from the same Rosa Mystica piece.

kokujin-kun says:

Thanks for your response, Shoujo Q. I think the line about the Rosa Mystica can be fixed by adding the word “each” somewhere in there.

You’re certainly right about OP and EDs being weird and full of poetic nonsense, and it’s not just restricted to ALI Project either. That’s why small errors made during mimicopying don’t factor much in my final grade. If it’s something that an average Japanese person can’t do perfectly, I’ll be forgiving.

However, lyrics that were clearly supposed to be imperatives (e.g. “nobotte, tadotte”) are changed into simple first-person present-tense verbs in the English lyrics. Those types of mistakes are less forgivable.

Shoujo Q says:

Yeah, we’ll be changing that line to “We were each created from one of the seven pieces of the Rosa Mystica” in our v2, which will be out after official OP and ED lyrics are available.

AnimeNOW says:

>I thought alpha timing stopped being cool back when Lunar folded.
You should stay away from Anime-Koi’s releases

Enamelthyst says:

Oh man, their Karneval abused alpha timing on a level of which I had not previously even begun to conceive.

Shoujo Q says:

We at Aidoru believe that while no technique should be OVERused or abused, alpha timing has its place when the line contains a gap used for suspense – alpha timing allows us to keep all the information on one line without spoiling the suspense for the viewers.

kokujin-kun says:

To each their own, I guess. It’s just a long time since I’ve seen alpha-timing being used. But I guess I haven’t been seeing a lot of fansubs for a while, lol.

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