deep: A video game by Dark_Sage

Article, Video Games — By on December 28, 2013 1:06 am

This post was written by Dark_Sage. He is Dark_Sage.

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I am pleased to announce the release of the game that will likely be at the top of everyone’s “Best Games of 2013” list: “deep”.

What is deep

Well, deep is deep. More simply, deep is a game that contains no gameplay. In fact, deep does not even exist. That’s the point.

A theoretical screenshot of deep.

A theoretical screenshot of deep.

This is all entirely in the service of deep’s lessons, and not because I’m lazy or incompetent at all.


Who is deep’s intended audience


Well, every intellectual, of course! If you aren’t a genius, you simply won’t get deep. But if you are, deep will be the game that appeals the most to you. That’s just how it’s built.


Why deep


deep provides an experience like no other: it will confirm every single one of your biases, while refuting anything that disagrees with your worldview. Do you think ___ is bad? deep will show everyone how right you are. Do you think ___ is good? Let deep guide everyone’s paths toward the land of righteousness you dwell in.

That’s right, whatever you believe, deep will deliver. Because you are right. After all, if you weren’t, deep wouldn’t exist. Truly, everyone needs to understand what deep really is: you.


Where to buy


deep is not an experience that can be purchased with tangible, capitalist goods. Rather, deep can only be experienced through the concept of its own existence. That’s part of what makes deep the product it is.

You can also find it on Steamâ„¢ for $9.99, starting right now.


because if you dont like it you just dont get it

Because if you don’t like it, you just don’t get it. Buy now.

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Whiner says:

Gone Home does not deserve a single accolade it has been given.

Yurie says:

Stop whining.

Vanth says:


El Huesudo II says:

I still laugh whenever people call Evangelion “deep” without it being in jest.

Hell, even if it’s in jest.

fohfuu says:

It’s deep <:3c

El Huesudo II says:


Yurie says:

It’s psychological horror.

El Huesudo II says:

More like “it’s a psychologist’s horror”.

Nyangoro says:

I went to Steam and was sorely disappointed.


asterisk says:

Deep is Portal.

El Huesudo II says:

yeah, those portals are pretty deep, man

especially if you manage to put one inside the other

slackzy says:

I thought they were only 9 levels deep.

WithoutDecency says:

Deep is just a poor man’s copy of Depth I’m afraid. Simply not up to muster.

Anonymous says:

D_S are you high?

Billy says:

No, just deep.

autismoe says:

Help I don’t get it

Dark_Sage says:
I’m poking fun at the critical acclaim around games like “Gone Home” and “Papers, Please” that are incredibly popular right now, despite being complete garbage. I’m not going deeper into explanations than that, but the key to understanding the post is understanding what kind of games those are (poorly designed, force-feeding morals bullshit), and that tryhard “intellectuals” are absolutely tripping over themselves to call them the greatest things to ever exist.

Since this is an anime blog, I also decided to take the piss out of fans of series like Monster, Texhnolyze, Mind Game, and Ghost in the Shell by association. Not that I would expect fans of those series to ever understand when they’re being made fun of.

Akatsukin says:

You made me look it up on youtube so I clicked a let’s play. Seems like one of those recent exploration games that are more or less kinetic novels. It wasn’t very long, but the guy playing was a faggot, so yeah. I’m sure it’s interesting, but not twenty dollars interesting. You can get any good paperback for five bucks or so.

Sheep says:

Gone Home? It’s pretty terrible.

It’s an interactive media thing that prides itself on “using the video game medium to tell a story” yet spoon-feeds the entire story through text and you’re basically reading books and text and shit in drawers so it didn’t really do it that well at all.

The main narrative of the game is terrible, GH gives you no reason to care about the side narrative(which aren’t that much better) and they make the “story puzzle” thing with those incredibly easy to figure out, if there’s any real difficulty at all with that.

When a “game” makes “No Puzzles, No Combat,etc” a feature it uses as a /selling point/, that’s when it’s gone too far off the d33p end.

Yurie says:

“the guy playing was a faggot”

Must have been that wanker, pewdickpenis.

Dark_Sage says:

Megas zinger.

fohfuu says:

I was going to defend the games, then I realised I hadn’t played either of them.

I don’t think anyone but idiots trust your taste any more, though. It’s a proven fact that most people have shit taste, you and I included.

Fuwaa says:

From what I’ve seen so far, Gone Home is basically a visual novel.

Positive reviews: “It’s better than other games because it doesn’t have any real gameplay!”

Negative reviews: “It’s not a game because it doesn’t have any real gameplay.”

Papers, Please is a game where you play as an immigration officer, checking up on the documents for people trying to move to your country to make sure there are no discrepancies.

Positive reviews: “Graphics suck. Gameplay is monotonous. The concept sounds stupid. I’ve never played anything like it. It has such tough moral decisions to make! 10/10”

Negative reviews: “The graphics suck. Gameplay is repetitive. Concept is pretty dumb, but I’ll give a few points for trying something unique. 2/10”

I think you meant to say “I was going to defend the games, but I couldn’t find anything worth defending in them.”

Nyangoro says:

I actually think Papers, Please is pretty fun.

The gameplay requires you to organize and quickly be able to search for an increasing number of variables to make sure that they match. And you need to do it fast, otherwise your family dies.

Which ends up making the gameplay fast and furious as it grows ever more challenging. And that challenge is actually pretty fun.

Some people got so caught up in the narrative’s premise that they just attributed their perception of the job to the gameplay, without actually letting themselves for an unclouded opinion of the gameplay itself.

fohfuu says:

So what your saying is that your uninformed opinion is better than my uninformed opinion? Wow, that’s me told.

Fuwaa says:

… Well, it wasn’t my opinion, just the distilled essence of a number of different opinions from people who played the gamed. If I were to express my own opinion in response to your statement…

…I’d say that I think you’re a well-used twat for replying to an opinion about a few games with “I don’t know anything about these games but your taste sucks”. If you don’t have something constructive or at least amusing to say, don’t say anything.

El Huesudo II says:

Is it OK if I like the GitS franchise for the action, the characters and their interactions and the animation?

Because I don’t care how pretentious or not the story is, the Major is a badass, Batou is endearing as no other guy with cylinders for eyes can be, the action scenes are really cool, and the movies look gorgeous

Dark_Sage says:

It’s okay for you to like whatever the hell you like. It’s when people start ascribing their preferences to being in service of objective quality, that I take issue with it. And when people start throwing around “I like ____ because I’m smarter than you” seriously, they’re pretty much just begging for whatever flak comes their way.

Ash says:

God, I fucking hate Monster. Pretentious, melodramatic nonsense.

2ColouredEyes says:

the last caption, first I read it as derp. how come?

Yurie says:

It’s because your mind exposed you as the person you really are.

shcboomer says:

10/10 would deep again.

Vagoo says:

Can’t wait for the anime adaptation.

stushi says:

You know what’s deep? YOUR MOM’S-
yeah, no. just no. nu-uh nope. no.

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