Anime North 2014 – Days 0/1 – Thursday/Friday

Article, Conventions — By on May 28, 2014 7:13 pm

This post was written by Dark_Sage. He is Dark_Sage.

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Nikki, link me your tumblr or something. I need your art like AN needs to not be located on a fucking highway.

A list of the players at this con:

  • Aieon
  • Ash
  • Curser656
  • Daniel
  • denpa
  • jakeman95
  • Jenny
  • Joji
  • Melinda
  • McKenzie/Kaia (This is your one shout-out. Enjoy it.)
  • Nikki
  • rarely_upset
  • Ruwinda
  • Some guy who said he remembered me from last year but whom I had no recollection of at all so I had to be like “Yeah dude I have no fucking idea who you are” because honesty is the best policy and I’m nothing if not the best.
  • TheThing


This may or may not be the last time you see these names, because the most important part of this story is Dark_Sage.



4:00 Canada time. My body was certainly ready.


I could hardly keep all the hype in my mouth.


5:00 Nanana marathon, because it’s an anime con and there’s nothing better to do on Thursdays.

So it shall be.

Don’t mind if I did~


8:00 Met up with Aieon, Daniel, denpa, and rarely_upset at some shitty hotel restaurant because I ran out of Nanana to watch.

Aieon quickly left and the others ordered some pizza burgers that looked to be made of red oatmeal. I went with a $7 whiskey sour, and Daniel grabbed two beers, which came up to $13 each.

Canada: because fuck you.

Canada: because fuck you.

Jesus Christ, Canada. With prices like those, how do you expect anyone to get drunk enough to think getting drunk is a good idea? Get some civilization in your pricing schemes, please.


9:00 Went to denpa’s hotel room to watch Wolf Children.

Basic plot is a girl falls in love with a guy because he’s dark and moody, but then it turns out he’s a wolf in disguise! Holy wow! So anyway, she takes the knot and they have kids.

The wolfdad dies because he jumps off a bridge, then the wolfgirl falls in love with a human boy and the wolfboy becomes a perma-wolf because he hates humans and loves nature.

I wish I was fucking with you, but this is what the movie is.

I wish I was fucking with you, but that’s actually the plot and this is what the characters actually look like.

Honestly, I don’t see how anyone could legitimately enjoy a film as shallow and dull as this furfag bullshit ended up being.

MAL, apparently, disagrees

MAL, apparently, disagrees.



After the movie ended, we were about to make a blanket fort, grab some lotion, and turn Bible Black on, but Fyurie told denpa he had to sub Isshukan Friends for Kaylith instead.

Way to kill the vibe, Fyurie.

Way to kill the vibe, Fyurie.

Figuring that was the end of Thursday night’s fun, we packed it in and headed to bed.




10:00 Woke up and went on IRC, because fuck showering at cons.

Dark_Sage: Gonna hit up Harvey’s around 10:30 then double back to get a review in before heading off to the press place to get my badge
Dark_Sage: Also looking at myself in the mirror. Holy fuck am I sexy
TheThing|con: hehe
TheThing|con: It seems someone has my badge
TheThing|con: dunno where he is
Dark_Sage: It can’t be helped
TheThing|con: You know dark sage
TheThing|con: since you have to eat
TheThing|con: and I have to eat
TheThing|con: we could go eat together
Dark_Sage: \o/
TheThing|con: and it would simply be two people who happen to eat together at the same place

And so, plans were made.


10:30 Harvey’s

What the fuck am I eating?

“Is this rat?”

How do you fuck up a hamburger so badly, Canada?

While suffering through the “food” at this shitty restaurant, we made a bet as to which show would be the most overcosplayed at the con: Kill la Kill or Attack on Titan. TheThing picked Attack on Titan, because he assumed Canada would be extremely behind the times. Taking the position that the Canadians weren’t entirely a lost cause, I placed my bet on the newer series: Kill la Kill.

Weekend spoilers:

TheThing won.


11:30 Since the con proper didn’t start till 5, TheThing and I headed back to my room, whereupon he got ahold of my phone and played some Love Live while I wrote up the Eveyuu NGNL review.

More virgin sacrifices, please~

A moment of silence for all the virgins who were sacrificed to get us here.


5:00 “Oh fuck, the con’s starting, let’s go”

TheThing and I ran over to Aieon’s room to grab his pass. There, we met Joji, who decided to follow us… until he realized we were going to some gay panel.



Come on, man. It’s 2014, nothing wrong with a little guy-on-guy action.

Or a lot of it.

Or a lot of it.


5:15 Slash Fiction

We didn’t know what exactly we were in for, but we knew it was gonna be gay as shit. And also, it turns out, boring.

Slash my wrists, more like.

Slash my wrists, more like.

Halfway through, Jenny and Nikki rolled in, so we spent about 20 minutes deciding what panel to go to next, while only half-listening to what was going on at this one.

And because we were vocalizing our decisions (how else were we supposed to communicate?), we ended up getting yelled at by some old lady for being too loud. Sorry obaa-san, I thought we were in Canada, not fucking North Korea.


6:00 TCC

TheThing left right before we got here, which was a damn good decision; whoever designed the fucking layout here needs to be slapped and/or rape-murdered.

There were huge swaths of empty space that gave way to the most tightly packed pathways anyone could come up with. Signs weren’t present, and the event placement was ridiculous.

Hey, let's put the wrestling ring right next to Artist's Alley and then hide the Dealer's Room behind a secret fucking entrance.

“Hey, let’s put the wrestling ring right next to Artist’s Alley and then lock all the exits except for one!”

After an hour of that shit, we managed to escape… just in time for the skits to start.


7:00 Went to the skits contest and skipped past people who had been waiting in line for several hours cuz :media badge:. Don’t worry, AN staff, we did great justice to the press pass by recording the skits on a cell phone.

More on the Youtubs channel:

(If you listen to the commentary, that’s pretty much how the entirety of the con went with Jenny and Nikki. Good times.)


9:00 Ask an LGBTQ Titan (18+)

Thought we’d hit up this panel for some quality Shingeki lulz, but it turns out that Jenny and Nikki are in like middle school or something, so that wasn’t really gonna work out.

I swear I thought they were at least 13!

I swear, officer, I thought they were at least 13!

Since they had to be out of the con by 10:00, I walked them back to their bus stop (I treat my fangirls right), then caught up with TheThing as he was leaving the International Plaza.

As soon as we hit the stop, TheThing and I about-faced and headed back to the Sheraton for drunken shenanigans.

So long, ladies~

So long, ladies~


10:00 Drunken Shenanigans


  • Curser
  • Daniel
  • Rarely
  • Denpa
  • TheThing
  • Dark_Sage
  • Ruwinda
  • Melinda


  • I (practically) pocky kissed denpa.
  • We ate $50 worth of some really stupid -and awful- Japanese food.
  • Ruwinda was a fucking dumb ass and tried to cook ramen in the goddamn hotel ice box. Didn’t know whether to hate the guy for being such a fuckwit or love him for being so committed to the party. …Guess we’ll go with both.

Whatever else happened, I’ve already forgot. But it was a party in my room and the liquor was flowing, so I think you can guess some of the events that transpired.

Eventually, we decided to head back to the con.


12:15 Kyoukai no Kanata Panel

As we walked in, Curser gave us the universal “a fate worse than death awaits you here” signal, so we nope’d the fuck out of there.

Go! Go! Go!

Go! Go! Go!

With nothing else to do, we went to…


12:25 The Outdoor Rave

Which was awful. So we went to…


12:30 The Indoor Rave

Which didn’t exist, despite Ruwinda’s very vocal statements to the contrary. So we went to…


12:40 Late-Night Karaoke

She was the only girl to sing over a period of 30 minutes. By the time the second douchebro got to the mic for another awful a capella rendition of a terrible song, we had sobered up enough to make the wise decision to turn in for the night and hope for a better tomorrow. And what a tomorrow it was.


Saturday: Incoming

Sunday: Incoming

Tags: , , ,


jenny says:

DS so gentleman irl ;A; bought me ice cap from Timmies ;A; even called it Timmies am starting to think he’s actually Canadian pretending to be American ;A; didn’t even mention the fact we left the skits early bc I was about to pee myself ;A;
I’m still mad I didn’t get invited to the party but I’m only 8 years old so I guess it can’t be helped!

Dark_Sage says:

And so gentleman on the internets too. Why else would Crymore be so loved by all?

Humanity says:

Probably the great comment system.

GeneralG says:

Canada just has bad taste in general. Best way to make an anime club empty is to enter the room and put Kill la Kill on. Everyone runs away like if I had just shat on the floor. I’m not part of the club but it’s easy to just enter and snatch the tv at times. Anime fans aren’t combatives people.

Dark_Sage says:

Until it comes to a waifu discussion, of course. Then all bets are off.

TheUberAsian says:

Wait… Blanket Forts? Saying guy-to-guy action? Are most of you females?

Dark_Sage says:


rarely_upset says:

Do you want us to be? It’s 2014 and these things aren’t set in stone.
How about it?

Writing this comment reminded me of this:

Period says:

You don’t need to be a female to like a little guy-on-guy action. Open your mind a little man

fohfuu says:

Stop being such a faggot and accept the gay

mini-ezo says:

Oh, the irony of that statement.

Humanity says:

That rave looked like the ravest thing to ever rave.

Dark_Sage says:

Whoa, you’re jumping ahead. The rave video you’re referencing was filmed on Saturday. No spoilers!

puddi says:

late-night karaoke never is bad

Dark_Sage says:

Early morning kara is always the best, though.

Solaristics says:

>Whatever else happened, I’ve already forgot. But it was a party in my room and the liquor was flowing, so I think you can guess some of the events that transpired.

( ¬‿¬). Terrible con it seems, just like you said on IRC. How were the rest of the days? Let me guess, shit.

Justinnnnnn says:

>Honestly, I don’t see how anyone could legitimately enjoy a film as shallow and dull as this furfag bullshit ended up being.

gr8 b8 m8

Dark_Sage says:

It was legitimately shallow and dull, though. A number of the scenes were uncomfortably awkward due to poor pacing, the premise is literally just stupid furfag bullshit, the character motivations made no sense, and the story was unfulfilling and scattered. Just because something’s popular, doesn’t mean it’s good, despite what reddit tells you.

PP says:

It’s just overrated because it has the whole family theme behind it, probably wouldn’t call it shallow, bit dull if you don’t like the family stuff and whatnot.

>just stupid furfag bullshit
I’d say it’s bait for furfags, which worked quite well.

Ash says:

I was planning on watching the movie one of these days, but I hate furries so much that I’ve decided against it.

Dark_Sage says:

She takes wolf dick in one scene. Classy stuff.

Justinnnnnn says:

Hopefully one day you’ll see this again with your RL family and maybe, maybe you’ll understand why it’s good :(

Dark_Sage says:

Why would rewatching it with my dead parents help? Or am I going to need to track down my cousins for this one?

Kuroiryuu says:

>dead parents
Dark_Sage confirmed for Batman

Justinnnnnn says:

Well, it’s supposed to make you feel good and warm inside. Nevermind.

If anyone was thinking of watching this movie, don’t believe D_S-troll-mode and give it a try.

pengu says:

Nope, he’s right. This movie was so bad it made me cringe. Some of the scenes didn’t make any sense, not to me at least and the pacing was worse than Galilei Donna.

Fuwaa says:

If only I could feel good and warm inside from watching a movie just because it’s supposed to make me feel that way… movie budgets could be so much cheaper.

There’s pretty much nothing about Wolf Children that I’d want to see, except maybe the part where the father jumps off a bridge.

Justinnnnnn says:

It’s ok, greatness is often misunderstood. Someday man!

Kurt says:

>so I think you can guess some of the events that transpired.
d-did you fuck?

Dark_Sage says:

I can confirm that certain fluids were exchanged.

anon says:

>Eating at that Harvey’s

There’s a reason why people avoid it like the plague, I’m surprised that you’re not writing about having food poisoning.

Anonymous says:

None of my art is online. I will make something special just for you when I’m free.I am busy with my middle school exams right now!

Dark_Sage says:

Aww, you’re the best. Just remember to send it to the right nursing home address.

Dylan says:

> “she takes the knot and they have kids.”

I think you mean ‘ties’

alt0 says:

I didn’t know this is actually a phrase for this.
Gotta make sure that I never mistake this one for “tie the knot”.

Govna says:

Denpa can’t stop talking about you. You’ve left him lonely.

Dillon says:

No anime reviews for weeks.

nakkinyan says:

Still going to Colossalcon D_S? I should be there around 2 when they do regular tickets.

Dark_Sage says:

Couldn’t get a hotel, so no.

nakkinyan says:

Not sure why, half the hotels in town should still be open… little shits still have school this week thanks to too many snow days.

nakkinyan says:

Little bastards will be deprived of anime and Cedar Point, the real reason we have 5x the normal amount of hotels.

Dark_Sage says:

I wasn’t gonna waste my time and money on an offsite hotel.

Hotel+last-minute flight+badge cost… It’s not like I can’t afford it, but the opportunity cost… I could buy an Aniplex release for that price.

Humanity says:

Gotta save up that cash for all 6 Kill la Kill LE sets…

Dylan says:

Damn I live in Ohio so I would be able to go to that but I still have school. And I have no money anyway. Whatever

Dillon says:

reviews when?

Period says:

next season

qwerty says:

RIP in peace Crymore.

kevi8991 says:

wtb > anime north saturday / sunday

-cough- TheThing -cough-

Dark_Sage says:

I can’t write about how he fucked half the girls at the con. This is a family-friendly site!

Fuwaa says:

I think you just said enough for it not to be family-friendly anymore.

Dark_Sage says:

Nah, it should be okay; I didn’t mention their ages.

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