Spring 2016 Preview – Part 1: 2012, This Is Not

This post was written by Dark_Sage. He is Dark_Sage.

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If I apologized for the delay, that just wouldn’t be sagey, now would it?

 

 

The Series

Kiznaiver

Kiznaiver

tl;dr: Quirky Japanese high schoolers are drafted into a government experiment, but -get this- the experiment is in communal pain! Get ready for a whacky adventure where if one kid gets hurt, they all get hurt. It’s a social experiment gone ~wild~. And did we mention how cra-zay everyone is? Make sure to hashtag all your lols, fellow kids, because this is gonna be a good one!

Manga: N/A

Light Novel: N/A

Animation Production: Trigger

Remember when Trigger was going to save anime? Tell me how that worked out.

As far as this low energy anime goes, take one look at this dopey faggot and tell me straight you’re legitimately interested in watching anything he’s starring in.

"Make him like Space Dandy except even more intolerable."
“Make him like Space Dandy except even more intolerable.”

From a studio that made an enjoyable homage to hormones once — three fucking years ago — it’s pretty clear the magic is as gone as Japan’s interest in interesting content. Neither the premise nor the depicted execution has any hope of rescuing Japan from the all-encompassing malaise that has set itself upon the anime industry.

Still, at least we’re getting more Boom Boom Satellites. (Too bad their last good song was in 2009.)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-OpQVGICr1c

 

 

Bungou Stray Dogs

Bungou_Stray_Dogs

tl;dr: Superpowered detectives go around solving mysteries or someshit, being careful to never let a main character face real consequences, cuz that’d mean the author would actually have to think for once.

Manga: http://bato.to/reader#8b0b0ca97478fe65_2

Light Novel: N/A

Animation Production: BONES

A cast filled with troped-up bishies is liable to raise discerning eyebrows, but I can promise all your most pressing fears are unfounded. Bungou would be just as good even if you didn’t wanna give each of the boys a tongue bath.

Okay. Almost as good.
Okay. Almost as good.

The sense of irreverence Bungou has for its overused plot is exhibited at every chance it gets, with frequent twists that don’t mean much on their own, but add up to an incredibly engaging experience. I get the sense it started out more as a writing exercise, kicked off by a “make the most generic premise ever into something unique” prompt.

The_Cool_Kid_Crew
Glarey eyes are so hype.

While it doesn’t quite escape its bargain-bin mold, when a writer’s playing around, I can’t help but nod along approvingly. Fun’s contagious after all.

…And did I mention the characters are cute?

Shipping like a dock on the bay.
Shipping like a dock on the bay.

From a review standpoint, I can’t wait to see what all the top-tier fansub groups do to the show. If you don’t think some wannabe Americans like Hiryuu are gonna go full Nintendo and localize Ranpo Edogawa into Stephen King, you have more faith in the middle school dropouts than I do.

 

 

Big Order

We_shaft_now

tl;dr: Mirai Nikki, but worse in every way.

Manga: http://bato.to/reader#ddca6c98bc6f32de

Light Novel: N/A

Animation Production: asread

No PV yet, but the OVA looked nice.
No PV yet, but the OVA looked nice.

While I wish I could evaluate Big Order on its own, there’s no getting around that the show lives in the specter of its spiritual predecessor (Mirai Nikki/Future Diary) in almost every way possible. Though I wouldn’t be surprised if Sakae was doing this intentionally, as part of some ~grand multiverse-spanning reveal~ that’s not the right way to create a lasting, memorable franchise.

Not_Yuno's crazy, what a surprise!
Not_Yuno’s crazy, what a surprise!

Now, I don’t wanna get too negative here, cuz the formula sure as hell wasn’t broke in Mirai Nikki, and Big Order retains enough suspense and cool shit happening to justify the formulaity. But this is a preview, and I at least owe y’all a warning here.

Ain’t much else to say, so follow this simple process to see if you should watch the show:

If you…

  • Haven’t seen Mirai Nikki: watch Mirai Nikki
  • Liked Mirai Nikki: watch Big Order
  • Didn’t like Mirai Nikki: kill yourself
I look forward to fanboying over this with ya next month.
See y’all next month.

 

 

Robotech Delta

Macross_Delta

tl;dr: In [CURRENTYEAR], anime is dying. And the only way to save it is with the power of elves in spandex dancing their way across space. Bring a towel and be prepared for frequent hand checks.

Manga: N/A

Light Novel: N/A

Animation Production: Satelight

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dG8-5LV0uPE

People have told me the first episode is already out, but I checked and there don’t appear to be any English subs available, and it doesn’t look like we’ll be getting any anytime soon.

The_Only_Constant_Is_Delta
#RIP

All’s I know about this damn thing is that Macross Frontier was amazing, and this looks to be more of the same. Justify my fandom, Satelight. I need this. ;_;

 

 

Flying Witch

Flying_Witch

tl;dr: >”Kowata Makoto is an air head with a bad sense of direction that just moved into her relative’s house… But is that all?”

Yes. Next anime, please.

Manga: http://bato.to/reader#1a978720ae0b4090

Light Novel: N/A

Animation Production: J.C. Staff

Do you recall anything happening in that trailer? No? Then why the fuck would you want to watch this?

Fuck off J.C. Staff, and give me DanMachi S2. This vapid slice-of-life bullshit ain’t worth any of the five goddamn frames that were wasted on it.

Wah, indeed.
Wah, indeed, you wide-eyed fucktrash.

 

 

Boku no Hero Academia

Satan's_Alley
AKA Satan’s Alley

tl;dr: If you despise yourself, Academia’s gonna be your the anime of the season.

Manga: http://bato.to/reader#816a66c3839577f3_3

Light Novel: N/A

Animation Production: BONES

In a world where a significant part of the population is born with super powers, one boy without any dreams to get super powers of his own, enduring ridicule and torment from his peers and society as a whole. And then he gets handed the strongest super powers of all: overwhelming strength and speed.

Subtle, Academia is not.
Subtle, Academia is not.

If you were hoping for some cliche bullshit like “hope is the strongest power of all”, followed by the main character struggling to find his place in a world where he combats natural talent with effort… Well no, he actually just gets handed the strongest super powers of all within the first two chapters.

Academia ain't what it used to be.
Academia ain’t what it used to be.

Unlike One-Punch Man, which takes this shitshow’s premise, mocks it, and actually manages to make it entertaining… Academia’s intolerable sub-mediocrity would make anyone suffering its existence wish for a lobotomy.

Avoid like the author avoided learning how to write.

 

 

Anne Happy

GENERIC_LOLI_BITCH

tl;dr: How the fuck has my life got to the point where I’m covering a goddamn show about whiny elementary schoolers at 1 AM in the fucking morning? 15-year-old me would kill himself if he knew this was his future. (16-year-old me would accept it as inevitable.)

Manga: http://bato.to/reader#816a66c3839577f3_3

Light Novel: N/A

Animation Production: SILVER LINK

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rpjDiuovy9Q

Despair

That’s it, fuck this, I’m gonna finish off half a bottle of Maker’s and hope I’m dead in the morning. If not, guess I’ll see you in two months when I finally get around to the second part of this preview. My hype for this season is tangible.

 

 

 

tl;dr

Wooser

If you wanna be entertained:

  • Bungou Stray Dogs
  • Big Order
  • Macross Delta

 

If you’re really that bored:

  • Kiznaiver

 

If you hate yourself:

  • Flying Witch
  • Boku no Hero Academia
  • Anne Happy

 

…I could’ve been an astronaut.

34 thoughts on “Spring 2016 Preview – Part 1: 2012, This Is Not”

  1. woah, could it be that we are finally done with LN adaptions about an oblivious chick magnet who enrolls in a high school that specializes in teaching magic

    Reply
    • As long as there are vapid 14-year old kids that keep discovering teh animus for their first time, there’ll be an audience for just that.

      I havent watched a new series since… 2011? And that was K-On’s second season, since it seemed to have something resembling a budget behind it. Anyway, I don’t think I’ve missed anything. First we got waves and waves of moecrap, then the light novel adaptations and their wacky titles started showing up and now we are going back to generic combat toddlers.

      Just stop, japan. Stop having sex completely and just die out. The well’s run empty by now.

      Reply
  2. Flying Witch looks pretty good.
    I’m gonna watch あんハピ though I have a feeling it will disappoint me.

    D_S, where are the days when you would cover a dozen of shows or more?

    e: oh shit, edit button. With a timer!

    Reply
  3. I thought I was the only one who really liked Danmachi, though that whole “it’s against the rules for gods to enter the dungeon but let’s do it anyways” thing was kinda weird.

    Why did I keep hearing that Boku no Hero Academia was better than HxH? Were people being ironic or what

    Reply
    • It’s not better than HxH, but it is very good overall and has never had a chapter that was less than good. I’m pretty sure D_S has only read like the first few chapters which is easily the worst part of the manga so far.

      Reply
      • I got about three chapters in, couldn’t believe my little shounen was this generic, then moved on as quickly as possible. How long does it take to “get good”? Because in general adaptation terms, it’s already failed the three-episode test.

        Reply
        • Well maybe at least read chapter 4 so you could see that he doesnt get handed the “strongest super power of all”. He got “handed” super strength that he (still) cant use properly and which has a high physical cost to use. I mean it remains fairly standard shonen fare but there’s a bit more going on than your “summary” suggests.

          Reply
          • Okay, I guess I read four chapters then. He gets the strongest power ever but he can’t use it infinitely, what a terrible limiter.

            Reply
            • Cant use it infinitely? He can use it basically once, a one shot and then you’re out power is quite different from the “lol superman” you’re presenting it to be. It also has a fairly significant cost, which he only sidesteps once or twice (i.e. the free healing he gets in chapter 4 is not a regular thing). So yeah, sarcasm aside, having your arm explode is a pretty bad limiter.

              It also, demonstrably, isnt the strongest power, several of his classmates have stronger powers than the crippled version he has and they introduce other characters that have a similar power level to All Might. Again, it is what it is, but what it is is a bit more than what you’re presenting it as. Four chapters may certainly be enough to tell if something is for you or not but on the other hand it also may not be enough to make a sound judgement on.

              The story does pick up as it goes on and expands the cast and gives a better look at how the world at large operates. There arent a huge amount of “superheroes are part of normal life” settings out there either which probably adds to its popularity.

              Reply
              • If you are seriously implying anything with superheroes is unique, you’re telling everyone just enough about your mental competency to justify ignoring you entirely.

                He has the powers of a guy who was introduced as the greatest superhero of all time ever, which basically means there’s no real tension. The laughable characters (“I’m evil cuz I’m evil, rawr” and “I’m good cuz I’m good, yay”) only serve to underscore the failure of the premise.

                There’s no room for the series to be good without entirely invalidating the first few chapters, so excuse me if I’m not all starry eyed about any of the later arcs.

                Reply
                • I know being condescendingly insulting is your shtick, but dont you find it a little tiresome? I suppose it does have the advantage of allowing you to sidestep an argument in favour of attempted witticism.

                  I don’t know why you’re talking about implications, I’m not implying anything I meant what I stated and as you apparently didnt read it I’ll repeat it “There arent a huge amount of “superheroes are part of normal life” settings out there.” To clear up any confusion by superhero I’m talking about the common meaning of the word i.e. four colour american style superheroes. There aren’t a lot of american style superhero manga in the first place and there certainly arent a lot, in either american comics or manga, where being a superhero is a common job/most of the population are superpowered. Off the top of my head, Alan Moore’s Top 10 and Y – gamma are the only two that spring to mind (I’m sure I’m forgetting some). The point being the world is relatively unique.

                  Now perhaps as you implied I am an idiot so if there are lots of american style superhero manga or Top 10 style worlds I’d genuinely consider it a favour if you pointed them out. Unless of course you thought by superheroes I meant anything with superpowers, which would of course be foolish as nearly every shonen would fall into that pointlessly broad category.

                  Again the protagonist doesnt have the powers of All Might, he will eventually have them but at the moment he has a tiny percentage of them that he cant use without cost(and he wont get them all unless All Might dies). I dont see how his eventual power level robs the story of the tension his current power level provides. Thats like saying theres no tension in any shonen because the protagonist will always survive. Or that all zero to hero style stories inherently lack tension (an argument I could certainly see having some weight, even if Campbell is sitting in the corner sobbing about his wasted work)

                  I dont recall any of the main bad guys being introduced in the first four chapters other than the largely mindless blob guy, the general motivation for the bad guys seems to be money but moves towards ideological grounds later on. The heroes have a variety of reasons for wanting to be heroes, fame, fortune, family pressure and so on. Thought they only get into that later on. So I assume you’re referring to All Might or the Protagonist then? While not perhaps believeable wanting to be a hero to do good is a genre staple. I’m also unclear (guess its because of my mental competency right?) how they highlight a failure of the premise.

                  Why would you think I expect you to be “all starry eyed” about later arcs which you havent read? That would be a rather bizarre expectation. Almost as bizarre as reading ~1/20th of a book and assuming you can predict the rest of it with perfect accuracy.

                  Anyhow, this is just going round in circles, I think your “summary” is mis-representing what actually happens, both in terms of the protagonists power level and the idea that he doesnt put in any effort, you think differently and neither of us is changing their mind so I’ll leave it there.

                  Reply
        • It gets good around ch. 9. By adaptation standards, that would be about the 3rd episode of the anime so it would pass the test. I think the first couple chapters are really good, but the next few chapters are repetitive with some of the character’s traits. Once it gets going it just gets better and better though.

          Most shounen have terrible starts because they’re just trying not to get canceled.

          Reply
          • Is that why J.C. Staff changed the Deep Blood and Angel Fall arcs so fucking much and not even for real reasons for Index?

            Reply
  4. >No 進撃のちび巨人 ー フューチャー・トレーン

    >No Sakamoto

    The hell Sage, you missed hype anime and best anime.

    Reply
    • In America, the original Macross series was localized as something called Robotech — a butchered version of a number of Macross series, stitched together into one unrecognizable, uncensored mess. For a long time, American audiences only knew Macross by the Robotech name. Robotech influences last to this day, as the company which owns the Robotech rights (Harmony Gold) pretty much owns all rights to Macross distribution in the West, meaning we will never see an official version of any new Macross series.

      So uh, tl;dr: It’s a joke. And if you see something on this site that doesn’t make sense, I’m probably fucking around there too. I’m mildly surprised non-Fansub Reviews even interest non-native speakers, considering the amount of wordplay and American cultural references I throw in them (which I believe comprise the bulk of the Crymore experience), but damn do I love y’all anyway. <3

      Reply

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