Fansub Review: [Hiryuu] Maken-ki (Episode 05)

This post was written by Dark_Sage. He is Dark_Sage.

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I had to watch four episodes of this show prior to this review. Pity me.

Release format: MKV (8-bit, 488 MB), MKV (10-bit, 377 MB)

Japanesiness: Honorifics. Japanese name order.

 

Karaoke.

Opening. The text for the k-timing queues at the top and then drops down. I can understand the novelty potential here, but why on earth was this actually greenlit?

Ending. Much better than the opening. The kara was really suitable for the ending song. “Soft” is the first word that pops to mind, but again, this is complimentary to the song that’s playing.

Typesetting.

Script.

Why go so far as to make the overlap font an entirely different size than the regular one? Looks bad.

on the school grounds

Now, unfortunately, I can’t think of the rule that makes this wrong and I don’t feel like making shit up just to seem smart. In cases like these, it’s smart to check how most people say it. From there, we can deduce if it’s actually a mistake or simply Dark_Sage losing his mind.

1 result on Google for “incidents in school grounds”

15,600 results for “incidents on school grounds”

2 results for “incidents in the school grounds” (one of which is to Hiryuu’s script)

14,000 results for “incidents on the school grounds”

Vindication!

“I’ll move your budget request to the top of our list for the time being.”

These sentences don’t even seem related. Change the second line to “H-Have I really?”

  

This reads like a list. This is not a list.

“Act like the pathetic idiot you are:

stay still and watch!”

Swear to god I’ve fucking had it. Every other editor fucks this up. I’d execute you all for crimes against English if I could.

Senpai is capitalized here because it’s being used in place of Haru’s real fucking name, and this lesbo here is all “Kyaa, Senpai-chan!” all the fucking time. To her, this is a main term of address for Haru. So fucking capitalize it.

Am I going to have to make an article on this? I think I am. Why has it come to this?

“Haruko-senpai” is actually what she says.

 

Watchability: Watchable.

Overall grade: B

I liked this script in that I liked the mistakes. I had to actually think as to why some of them were wrong. This reviewer’s fun aside, the script’s all right as is the typesetting. Wasn’t a fan of the OP karaoke, but the ED kara made up for it. Solid B.

0 thoughts on “Fansub Review: [Hiryuu] Maken-ki (Episode 05)”

  1. ”Why go so far as to make the overlap font an entirely different size than the regular one? Looks bad.”

    Best thing I can think of is that one of those sentences may be a ”secondary sentence,” in which case it would be appropriate.

    ”I forced you not to text for help.”

    There are so many reasons as why text for help would work and call wouldn’t just as there are many reasons as why call would and text wouldn’t. Call may sound more natural, you are used to hearing that as well, but that doesn’t mean texting for help doesn’t make sense. That doesn’t mean calling for help is a better choice of words.

    In the school grounds or on the school grounds?

    On: It happens above ground level.
    In: It happens below ground level (inside the ground).

    Can’t do much better. :(

    Reply
    • 1. “Secondary” as in background speech? I don’t believe it is. Even if it were, it’s more distracting than helpful.
      2. Translation is all about natural speech. This wasn’t natural. If you’re that hardcore on “texting”, I can find you a better line.
      “I forced you to not send a message for help.” <- Sloppy line, but it gets the point across in a more natural way. This would preserve the "texting" idea. 3. That's not how it works. Mmm... how to explain when it would be suitable to use "in the school grounds"... I'm drawing a blank right now. Gimme a bit to think of a reply.

      Reply
      • To help with you drawing a blank.
        3. on the basketball court vs in the basketball court.
        EDIT: I didn’t read your reply properly >_>

        Also, I’ve always done the alt font as a different size, I’ve no idea why to be perfectly honest. animegio tells me he doesn’t like it either, so that’s easily remedied going forward.

        Pssst, you forgot to set the grade taxonomy so I sneaked in and did it all stealthy like.

        Reply
  2. > “…senpai.”
    I took this as being short for “Haruko-senpai,” meaning the “senpai” would’ve been the honorific. That’s why there was no capitalization used in this case.

    > Dialogue: 0,0:11:44.40,0:11:47.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I’ll send the others from the Disciplinary Committee a text.
    Dialogue: 0,0:20:40.26,0:20:43.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I forced you not to text for help.
    Therefore, “text” > “call” here. ;)

    Reply
    • 1. There was no indication that she even began to say “Haruko”, which would enable the “senpai” to remain on its own. Seems to me like you’re saying “…chan.” would’ve been an acceptable sentence too. I watched the scene again and it looks like “Senpai…” is the obvious choice here.

      2. I’m in the wrong on this one. Thanks for the info.

      Reply
    • Which one? FFFPeeps? The group that dropped it? (Even if they didn’t drop it, they’re 7 episodes behind and haven’t released in a month. They’re out of consideration.) For what it’s worth, I watched episodes 2 and 3 with their subs. They weren’t that good.

      Reply
  3. >>Am I going to have to make an article on this? I think I am. Why has it come to this?

    Actually, I’d be interested in reading that. There’s some usage cases I’m not so sure about. “I’m coming, Mom” is clear enough, but what about “I’m proud of you, son” or “Get off my lawn, boy”? Should “son” and “boy” be capitalized? There are lots of instances where common nouns are used as forms of address or in place of proper nouns: “What brings you here, traveler?” “Good work, soldier” “Get away from me, monster” etc. etc. Not to mention “sir” and “ma’am”. Should all of those be capitalized?

    Reply
    • Don’t make me spoil the article for ya :P

      “I’m proud of you, Son.” <- It might look a little weird, but that's because our parents usually call us by our names, so it's not as common. But it follows the same rules as other family titles like "Aunt", "Grandpa", "Mom", etc. The rules still apply to something like "Sister" (even though we'd hardly ever say something like "Hey, Sister!"). The others are going to tend toward avoiding capitalization. BUT these are all context-dependent. I could get all of them into situations in which they should be capitalized and situations in which they shouldn't. For example, let's take a setting where there's a bartender. We'll use "traveler" from your example. First thing he says to a guy who walks into the bar, "Hey, traveler. What'll it be?" Fast forward two years, the traveler still hasn't told him his name but they've been in contact often, so the bartender's adopted "traveler" in place of the guy's name. So when the guy comes back into the bar it should now be, "Hey, Traveler. What'll it be?"

      Reply

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