Fansub Review: [UTW] Accel World (Episode 04)

D-Tier, Fansub Review — By on May 18, 2012 2:01 am

This post was written by Dark_Sage. He is Dark_Sage.

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Fansubbing’s greatest group.

Release format: MKV (449 MB, 10-bit), AVI (196 MB)

Japanesiness: Honorifics. Japanese name order. “Princess Snow Black” in place of Kuroyukihime. “Senpai” used.

English style: American English.

Group website: http://utw.me/

Encoding details: http://pastebin.com/0pge3ZNV

8thsin’s translation critique: http://8ths.in/spring-2012-fansub-comparison-reviews#Accel

Ji-hi’s screenshot comparisons: N/A

 

Table of Contents

Visual Quality

Script Quality

Timing

Results

Visual Quality

Karaoke.

OP. The colors changed, which is nice, but the OP was still pretty fucking boring. Shit needs some k-timing.

Ending. Again, pretty fucking dull. But uhh, good job with the color changing. At least you guys… changed some colors… That’s about the best fucking praise I can give for the ED.

 

Typesetting.

They typeset more than Asenshi did. What
they did was okayish.

 

Other.

I hate this font.

This is a pretty bad encode. I have incredibly low standards, but this did not meet them.

Script Quality

Karaoke.

The OP/ED were just as nonsense as all the other groups’ versions. Fun times when you have lines like “A future of beauty takes off forward”. I’m just going to assume that none of the groups translating this had someone who could speak Japanese well enough to translate the songs properly. I guess their ED made a bit more sense, but on the third line when they fucked up with their ellipsis use again, I tableflipped some shit.

06/01/12 Edit: Well, looks like Commie managed to make the OP not suck. You know what that means. Script downgrade fiesta. ^_^

 

Main Script.

The fuck did I just read?

“was just” overuse.

“I-I was only helping her fix some problems with her Neuro Linker…”

Double fail here.

First problem is the shitty phrasing. In English we don’t run shit like

“I’m sure you can tell from his attitude.”

“He’s pretty angry.”

because it’s stilted. It doesn’t fucking flow. “He’s pretty angry, but I’m sure you can tell that from his attitude.” is how it looks in logical English progression. By no means is this a stand-alone example; they fuck up the phrasing a lot in this release (there were four or five times off the top of my head where it was blatantly terrible).

 

Second problem is the Engrish in line 2. It should be “She always gets angry when we talk.”

 

Line 1: “She always gets angry when we talk.”

Line 2: “I’m sure you can tell that from her attitude when she’s with me.”

Something I really hate in this release is that they don’t handle pausing sensibly. They also fuck up stutters — adding in stuttering where it shouldn’t be and leaving it out when it should be there. When a person speaks a sentence like this in English, it generally goes like…

And whenever we talk about Chiyu

*slight pause as fat kid realizes he said her name “incorrectly” followed by a quick correction of…*

I mean Kurashima

*change implemented, fat kid continues with the sentence*

she always…

We replace those asterisks with em-dashes. (Some guidelines call for commas instead, but there’s really no point when em-dashes do the job much cleaner.)

I don’t want to be a dick, but this English sucks.

“I don’t want to hold onto a dream only to be let down in the end.”

She’s not connected with Cyan Pile; she’s connected to him. {Well, we can argue semantics about the fucking plot, but he doesn’t know that shit yet, so my point stands.}

“I found out about Kurashima’s connection to Cyan Pile.”

It’s to such lengths. If you’ve heard it as “through such lengths”, you’ve heard it wrong because that’s an uneducated corruption of the actual term. Think about it for a second. How can you go through a length? It doesn’t make sense. You can go to a length, though. Measure five feet in front of you and then walk there. Congrats, you went five feet; a length five feet from where you originally were.

“I’ll still do your bidding, even without you going to such lengths.”

“You” does not match up to “one another”.

“You don’t need acceleration powers to attack another person.” {“you” matches up to “another person”}

OR

“We don’t need acceleration powers to attack one another.” {“we” (as in “we Burst Linkers”) matches up to “one another”}

I question the necessity of this specific translation. Why not “guardian” or something similar? She obviously wants his chode, but I don’t think this is a wincest anime.

Even so, I couldn’t even” ?

:/

“Still, I couldn’t even approach your high score.”

“linker” should be capitalized here because you capitalize it everywhere else in the episode. Be consistent.

 

You… You can’t transcend to a fucking level. The point of transcendence is to be above all fucking levels. When you transcend the level system, you go beyond it so that the numbers are meaningless. Understand the fucking words you’re using. If you want to go to the next level, use ascend. You know, like “I ascended the stairs just to throw UTW’s editor off the third floor railing.”

Also, you can’t “reach” the origin. That’s like “reaching” the Big Bang or someshit. You can discover the origin of something, though.

“You’ll defeat the Kings, ascend to the next level, and discover the origin of Brain Burst.”

You don’t fucking bow before kings; you kneel before them. And don’t fucking try to argue that Japan doesn’t understand this shit. They fucking know.

Edit: I guess some Japanese people do bow to kings. Whatever. Criticism won’t affect the final grade, but I’ll leave the complaint up because <3 Lelouch.

 

“several ten seconds”

UTW: King of Fansubs

“stand-alone” is generally used as an adjective. What are you doing?

“Is the cable just connected to the machine itself?”

“someone” turning into “that guy” does not make sense. “someone” is unspecific but “that guy” is very specific, mostly because of “that” being used. Reduce the fucking confusion.

“If someone activates Acceleration, they’re likely to be Cyan Pile.”

Err, no it won’t. This fat fuck realizes that once Cyan Pile battles Snow-chan, then she’ll automatically lose. The victory is decided based upon the participants in a duel, not the people in the match lobby.

“Everything will be decided in an instant, as soon as he challenges her to a duel.”

This doesn’t make grammatical sense.

“Everyone in our school should have heard about the accident, but…” {…why does he know?}

I know you think you’re being smart, but “aviate” means “to fly in a fucking airplane”. And the fat kid most definitely wouldn’t fit in one, so this line doesn’t make sense.

He gains the power of flight in the next episode, so this should be “And so, the young man soars.” or “flies” or whatever.

Apparently this is a preview quirk, so it’s not really a problem. Blame Japan.

 

Timing Review

Incoming. When “Timing Critique” is added as a category, you’ll know this part is done.

Results.

Watchability: Watchable.

Timing Grade:

Visual grade: C

Script grade: D-

Overall grade (timing results not factored in): D

One thing I’d like to note is that UTW is fucking random with their use of punctuation. You’ll see ellipses used for minor pauses between lines and then the next line with a pause will have no ellipses. It’s as if they don’t understand what the fuck they’re doing with the things because nobody in the group understands English.

The sheer amount of script errors this group had necessitates their grade (edited from an F to a D after a number of observations in the comments, but the script still sucks). And it wasn’t just the shit I pointed out that pissed me off; the entire script flowed like it was stuck in molasses.

They don’t get a fucking free pass just because their name is “UTW”. This release was pretty much unacceptable.

Grade:
Show:
Tags: , , ,

116 Comments

Drake says:

Hell yes. You tell em, D_S.

Nyangoro says:

“I don’t want to be a dick…”

You are such a liar :3

Beckett says:

The “Several ten seconds” thing is pretty fucking bad and a couple of the others raise eyebrows too, but a lot of this really seems like nitpicking sentences that appear to have been translated to sound conversational instead of having perfect grammar. I’ve played a lot of online games in my day and I can say with certainty that I have personally used the line “What was that lag?” many times. “Connection with Cyan Pile” seems fine, “Bow to the king” seems fine, a lot of this seems fine really. They definitely made some unforgivable mistakes (A Headshot for the Rumored Person? What the fuck is this shit?) but I certainly don’t think it was F quality, maybe like C.

Dark_Sage says:

“Conversational”? Really? All right, let me go through their script and pick out some fun sentences. It’s a 300-line shounen script, which makes it even worse how bad they fucking did.

Dark_Sage says:

Here are some things I made note of in the first 13 minutes.

http://pastebin.com/7J4HHA1e

If you aren’t convinced yet, I can post some more observations.

uSalt2 says:

“Whoever set this up must be watching right now. If I want to track him down, I’ll have to ignore it for now.”
Would ending two sentences with the same word be all right? I’m not sure if it would be considered repitition.

Dark_Sage says:

I wouldn’t have a problem with that because the flow is natural enough as-is. If they both ended in “right now”, I would.

uSalt2 says:

Oh, I see.
And for the following lines:

Uh… I did it, though.
Did what?
Cabling.

How would you edit that so it wouldn’t read “I did cabling.”? Just curious.

Dark_Sage says:

Dialogue: 5,0:03:53.91,0:03:56.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Uh… I did, though.
Dialogue: 5,0:03:56.29,0:03:57.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Did what?
Dialogue: 5,0:03:57.30,0:03:58.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I cabled with her.

“cabling” makes sense in the context of the show, so “cable” as a verb works.

Rem says:

>I question the necessity of this specific translation. Why not “guardian” or something similar? She obviously wants his chode, but I don’t think this is a wincest anime.

The term used is “oya” (親: parent, founder). I don’t mind parent in this case, considering the sci-fi element to the show. A parent and child is a common term for various elements of computing systems, similar to male and female in terms of hardware.

That’s how I took it when it first came up.

uSalt2 says:

“If someone activates Acceleration, they’re likely to be Cyan Pile.”
Wouldn’t “it” or “he or she” work better than “they’re?” It is referring to an individual, not a group.

Dark_Sage says:

Everyone uses “their” to refer to an individual of unknown gender. It’s just fucking easier that way even if it wouldn’t fly in a college essay. “it” wouldn’t work either, just FYI, because it’s used for inhuman things.

uSalt2 says:

But what if it isn’t human? What if it’s a bot? [not serious]

FalseDawn says:

“It” would work fine there because it’s not referring to the someone, “it’s likely to be” is a stock phrase. If it was “to give someone their clothes,” that’d be different, but that’s not how that sentence is working.

Dark_Sage says:

Good point. Thanks for pointing that out.

herkz says:

This is why you don’t translate shows that are simulcasted, kids.

uSalt2 says:

Especially when speedsubbing.

jdp says:

But A-!

Xythar says:

Ouch. I actually didn’t think the first episode was too bad when I watched it, but I didn’t get this far and some of that stuff is pretty inexcusable.

I’m kind of surprised to see an __ar encode look like that though, it must have been a pretty low quality source or something.

Jukey says:

The first screenshot he has looks so bad because it’s at the very start, and there’s always tons of macroblocking and other really stupid shit at the start of the broadcast. The problem, with the first shot anyway, lies entirely in the source. You can’t really fault UTW for that. I’m sure about 20 frames later it looks perfectly fine.

Xythar says:

Yeah, I figured it was probably something along those lines.

Kuro Ansokubi says:

This makes it more exciting to wait for Commie review. <3

FalseDawn says:

I don’t think the parent line is a valid error, because it mimics parent/child directory in computer terms rather than her saying she’s his mother – it’s a show-specific term that describes her relationship as her being the one who brought him into the game, so “guardian” is not a suitable synonym in this case.

(Thanks go to 8thsin’s blog on this one – I haven’t even watched the show!)

Xythar says:

Oh, also – I haven’t really seen it in context so I can’t really say, but “You don’t need acceleration powers to attack one another” is probably fine if “You” is being used to address a group of people. I’d probably have put “each other” instead of “one another”, but that’s a personal preference thing.

Dark_Sage says:

It’s a conversation between two people. And yes, I go with the

each other = two people
one another = three or more

rule myself. When she’s talking about “we” in my correction, she’s referring to all Burst Linkers.

Xythar says:

Oh, okay. Yeah, the “we” suggestion sounds much better then.

PolynAzn says:

Inb4 a tl;dr from 8thsin.

fgghjjkll says:

Sorry, Dark_Sage :(

Dark_Sage says:

For what, the timing? The poor English is no fault of yours.

CREDITS
Translator: 8thsin
Editor: Raze
Timer: fgghjjkll
Typesetter: ar
Encoder: ar
QC: Raze, 8thsin, Kusion

FalseDawn says:

Wait, what? The editor also QC’d? What was the point of that?

Xythar says:

I think they’ve had some shows where Raze translated, edited and QC’d.

Raggers says:

D-tier o.0 no-one was expecting that…
Anyway, I think you made a few mistakes here:

What was that lag?
-This sentence shows surprise. Neither of your versions did. Maybe “What was that?” would be fine if your were being pedantic about perfect syntax, but this is a common phrase for gamers, so I wouldn’t call it wrong.

with Cyan Pile
-An exlanation for those who didn’t understand: “to” shows the one-way relationship; he does not know Cyan Pile’s connection to her. No semantics involved, D_S was right, “to” is the right word here, not “with”.

parent
-First off, it is the right word choice, as Rem said. However, as it means something in the game outside the normal use of the word (like Burst Linker) I would say it should be capitalised, so “Also, I’m your Parent”.

will have heard
-He is convinced about this. It’s why he stayed up the whole night. “should” is too unsure. I’d be pretty confident such a high-profile figure in the school being injured would be known before school the next day, thanks to social networking. “will” is used as he is convinced. Not a point I need to labour anymore.

As for the rest of it, you’re right. And wtf was with the random lighter bar? I can only assume (hope) it was a problem with the raw, wherever they got it from.

lygerzero0zero says:

Mmm, more or less what I was going to say.

I’m also not seeing the issue with the “everything will be decided in an instant” line. Maybe I’m understanding it wrong, but isn’t he saying that the moment BEFORE Cyan Pile challenges her will be the crucial one, since that’s when he can interfere and challenge Cyan Pile to a match first? In which case the line is correct?

Anonymous says:

I don’t think it helps that the previous line is utterly nonsensical.

Raggers says:

Your understanding is correct, that is what he meant. I made another comment further down which fixes the line pretty damn well.

Nevreen says:

I think the “What was that lag?” and “Everyone in our school will have heard about the accident, but…” lines are fine, but, yeah, it’s still a pretty bad script.

OtakuDao says:

You’re being WAY too anal on the English they chose to use. Yes some of it was pretty bad but a majority was it was understandable and I find nothing wrong with that.

D_S Just being a fucking hypocrite. As much mistakes UTW has made, I’d still give them at least a B-. some things you pointed out as mistakes can only be viewed as self-sided opinions.

” I hate this font ”
” The ED and OP is Dull “

Lehman says:

What do you expect from someone who thinks “What was that lag?” and “bow before the future king” is wrong? I thought we already knew that D_S can’t into English.

Dark_Sage says:

If it’s a B- to you, it’s a B- to you. Congratulations, you’re using the site like it was intended — coming to your own conclusions after being presented by enough information to help you make an intelligent decision. Unfortunately, I don’t think you’re using my advice very effectively.

Having read my opinions on UTW’s release, you can no longer say, “Well, I didn’t know it was bad.” You know now. From your attitude here, it looks like you’re interested in watching UTW’s release for this show. But by picking out a release with poor English, you are consciously making the choice to surround yourself with bad English.

I can tell from your post that English is not your native language, so it’s beyond me why you would reject the opportunity to find releases with good enough English to help you improve your own skills.

Your vehemence is misplaced, sir, and I would recommend you look at other groups before going with UTW’s release. WhatStory is the best of the releases I’ve reviewed and their English is far better than UTW’s. I would imagine Commie and Hadena are also acceptable choices, though I cannot vouch for their quality before having watched the releases myself.

puddizzle says:

I don’t think “hypocrite” means what you think it means, OtakuDao.

Anon says:

>some things you pointed out as mistakes can only be viewed as self-sided opinions.
That’s right, he made many mistakes on his review yet the grade still remained D+. Whiners can really give you a great review or just give you a shitty trolls. He can be a reliable reviewer sometimes… yeah, sometimes… Just not this one. :)

Anonymous says:

Hmm, this review made me glance over the fifth and sixth episodes; the English in those two doesn’t seem too bad. Still, this episode is horrendous. “A headshot for the rumoured person” is easily one of the worst phrasings I’ve seen in a fansub. “And so, the young man aviates” was not a great line, although I don’t think there are any logical problems with it. In a sense, he is piloting the avatar.

herkz says:

That’s what happens when you have 2 “translators” and no editor. You get a bunch of really awkward lines.

A+ on Nyaa, though. Must be great.

Anonymous says:

Also, surely they can find time to improve the OP/ED translation? It almost feels as though it was translated purely with preserving tenses and language in mind, but that approach fails when the lines feel conceptually disconnected. I’m guessing, for example, there’s probably an implicit link between “a beautiful future takes off” and “We’ll all search for a place where we can fly”. If so, it should be expressed in the text in my opinion, because as it stands the entire thing feels strained.

herkz says:

Apparently they actually like that style of song translation.

Xythar says:

They have someone working for them who is quite good at coming up with English song translations that make sense (fnord, the guy who does about 95% of Commie’s songs) – they just choose not to use his work for whatever reason.

ar says:

@Dark_Fag

See:

http://www.merriam-webster.com/thesaurus/intermediate%5Bnoun%5D

Please to learn English.

Also why are you complaining about dumb shit not being typeset? Things on the list of never/most likely never to be typeset: Eyecatches, Pedestrian/Bicycle Crossing signs, etc.

RE: Encoding

The first 2 encoding issues are broadcast related, can’t be helped, shitty HDTV etc. The third one with the faint white stripe was a memory error during encoding and was fixed with a v2 patch the same day as this episode was released.

Furthermore, please stop trying to give any kind of objective encoding/typesetting reviews, because your hurr durr this is terrible comes off as pretty dumb and ill-informed when it’s clear that you have no idea what you are talking about.

Finally, my sources tell me that you are not a native English speaker, and that your English is shitty. Are these accusations true? Well I guess it would explain a lot of things if they are.

Dark_Sage says:

Typesetting
Important (lines in the street): http://www.crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/UTW_Accel_World_-_04_h264-720p804561F7.mkv_snapshot_03.43_2012.05.17_23.36.31.jpg
Not Important (title of the show): http://www.crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/UTW_Accel_World_-_04_h264-720p804561F7.mkv_snapshot_10.12_2012.05.18_00.31.55.jpg
Got it.

Encoding
You never released your “v2” outside of your site, so don’t be surprised when people don’t use that version.

Script
I didn’t know about intermediate being used in the sense of intermediary. Must be some regional thing because they appear to have the exact same definition in this context, which doesn’t make all that much sense. Synonyms generally have at least a slight difference in meaning. But now I know. One thing about me is that if I’m wrong, I’ll acknowledge my mistake and move on a smarter person. All you do by knee-jerking is remain mired in ignorance.

Butthurt
lol u mad

ar says:

Mad, nope. Why would I be mad at all? Please enlighten me~ I am just killing time while I wait for encoding stuff to do itself.

The title of the show is typeset during the OP, once is more than enough. If you don’t know that you are watching the show by that point, then not even typesetting the eyecatch will help your cause.

Also clearly you don’t understand the mindset of a typesetter. Let me explain it to you. Typesetting that STOP sign is important because doing so distracts from having to kill one’s self doing a bunch of far more annoying signs, also there is the far more basic reason that I did it because I could.

Since you seem to have no idea how long things take to do, let me put it in perspective. Doing that shitty pointless eyecatch title requires a good hour or twos work, vs doing that shitty pointless STOP sign requires like 10mins at most.

When one only has 5-6hrs to typeset an episode, they have to find a good balance between important signs and pointless shitty signs. That’s the true path to happiness, etc.

I hope I have enlightened you.

Dark_Sage says:

You want an A because your job is too hard? Aww, that’s cute.

The butthurt I was referring to comes from the last line of your comment. You know, the part where you imply that I don’t speak English natively and therefore my criticisms of your group’s Engrish are unfounded. But perhaps you’ve spent so much of your life being a passive-aggressive cunt that you really didn’t realize you come across like someone who just got their rectum rammed by their father. If that’s the case, I most humbly apologize for misinterpreting your sentiments. For what it’s worth, I definitely agree that you’re wasting your time encoding for UTW.

ar says:

Nah, an A would be asking too much. I’d settle for a B+ though, because some of those lines shouldn’t have gotten through, but blame Kusion and his playing games for that :>

I never once said your criticisms were unfounded, now did I? That’s just you misinterpreting what I said.

Sure some of your corrections are no better or barely better at best, compared to the originals. While at the same time some are also fine too.

I was told that you don’t like it when people call you out on your English. Thanks for the laugh at this early hour :>

Keep up whatever work it is that you do, and lighten up.

UPBOATS XD says:

> lines in the street
> important
wat

FalseDawn says:

Surely it’s the word on the street? *dohoho*

thecowgoesmoo says:

Oh, _ar. You don’t have to go through such lengths to defend UTW. If you thought about it for more than several ten seconds, you’d understand that Sage’s reviews aren’t meant for you to attack one another, but rather a chance to address weak points. Since your English is so good, perhaps if you QC’d episodes there wouldn’t be so many problems.

As a fansubber myself, I understand that it can be hard not to take it personally. Maybe on average you are much better than this. Even so, you should strive to be even better, and transcend to the next level of fansubbing!

Mahjong says:

>Even so, you should strive to be even better, and transcend to the next level of fansubbing!

Okay, you got me; I laughed.

furzi says:

Fuck, I laughed.

ar says:

I have actually tried to do this, but I wake up at 2am to work on Accel World and by the time I am finished typesetting at around ~11am-2pm I’m pretty much already worn out, and hungry, etc. You tend to miss and overlook things when you’ve been at it for over 10hrs straight.

Anonymous says:

Lost it.

Raze says:

I was just going to ignore this and let you make a fool of yourself, but since __ar started the ball rolling, here goes.

1) People use “What was that lag” in that way all the time. Your “explanation” doesn’t make sense either because it’s obvious “what” =/= “what kind of” in that context anyway.

2) It’s retarded in the Japanese too. It’s not my job to rewrite scripts to sound good if the original line was retarded anyway.

3) Valid. And unimportant.

4) He’s clarifying what he meant with “her attitude”. There’s nothing wrong with the flow or logic of these two lines. Your comprehension skills are either fucking terrible, or you probably don’t talk to actual people very often. Or both.

The typo is legitimate criticism.

5) The ellipsis works perfectly fine here, bro. It’s denoting an incomplete sentence. And no, I don’t care if wiki or google (which you seem to rely a lot on for your misinformed rantings) or your manual of style or w/e you use says otherwise. You clearly don’t give a shit about them either, seeing as you bitched up a storm about how Kusion used his quotation marks in Hyouka.

6) Arguing about this line would probably devolve into a my opinion > your opinion shitfest, so I’ll leave it at that. There’s nothing particularly wrong with it though.

7) Nitpick.

8) Valid, I suppose. “Through such lengths” is commonly used enough in everyday speech, however, that this criticism is nitpick-tier.

9) Valid.

10) Not that I like this particular translation of “oya” myself, but there’s nothing wrong with it. “Parent” doesn’t _have_ to connotate blood relation, y’know.

11) Valid.

12) Valid.

13) You _can_, you moron. You can transcend one level and end up at the next. That’s like saying you can’t exceed a level because “exceed” has to mean surpassing all levels, which is bullshit.

“Reach” is also fine there if you take “origin of Brain Burst” to be a goal or the end of a journey.

14) Uh, I’m really going to have to question your mastery of English if you’ve never heard of a phrase as common as “to bow before the king”.

15) Valid.

16) But it _is_ being used as an adjective here. Is / the machine connected to the cable / stand-alone?

I’ll admit it could definitely be phrased better, though.

17) Kind of nitpicky. “That guy” obviously refers to “someone”. I do remember not being too happy with this line, though, but my sleep-deprived brain couldn’t pinpoint the problem at the time.

18) He’s saying he only has an instant to challenge Cyan Pile to a duel _before_ Cyan Pile challenges Snow Black. Your “fix” results in a TL error.

19) The word “aviate” existed before airplanes, genius.

I’ll be the first to admit the script is sloppy; I was only able to get one edit pass on this episode (and episode 3, too, which was also poorly done). Still, in trying sooooooooo hard to make us look terrible, you’ve also succeeded spectacularly in demonstrating just how limited (and therefore terrible) your English is. You’ve proven yourself countless times of being incapable of reviewing anyway, and anyone who takes your comments without a pinch of salt deserves to be misled.

Nekumata says:

“Aviation is the design, development, production, operation, and use of aircraft, especially heavier-than-air aircraft.” Straight from Wikipedia.

I was actually thinking about responding to this seriously but then realised I couldn’t care less about this either way because shit show to begin with.

Dark_Sage says:

You can take on the Pastebin after this. If you still feel like I have no absolutely no valid criticism, I’ll come up with a second pastebin for the second half of the script. Hell, I’ll take a look at your script for a third time if I have to. It’s not hard to find shitty phrasing in this thing.

1. Based on the comments from the other people on this post, I’ll allow it.
2. You know you’ve reached a new low when you try to blame your shitty English on the Japanese script. Somehow, I doubt the other groups looked at the line, said “Well, ‘A headshot for the rumored person’ sounds accurate to me” and put in gibberish. You must be really full of yourself to play off shitty English as the fault of the Japanese script. But I guess that’s what you get when you put a navel-gazing TLC in an editor spot.
3
4. My problem wasn’t with comprehension. You really think I can’t understand that shit? I fucking rewrote it for you; of course I can fucking understand it. My problem is that’s not how Americans speak, and this bullshit fills your script. You don’t follow Japanese grammar when you translate into English, so why do you find it so fucking necessary to follow Japanese sentence progression when it’s so much easier to write lines like they were said by humans?
5. If you don’t understand how punctuation contributes to the flow of a line, then you really shouldn’t be editing.
6.
7.
8.
9.
10. Like the others said, it should probably be capitalized then because you capitalized every other fucking word related to the game.
11.
12.
13. No, no, no. Your interpretation is fucking insane and not based in reality. You don’t fucking “transcend” from level 9 to level 10. It reads like shit, please fucking see that. The only context in which transcend would work like that is
“Yes, little Billy transcended from third grade to fourth grade.”
“I hope you get raped, contract AIDS, and die alone, because that is some goddamn shitty English right there.”
You have to take extreme liberties to get “goal or end of a journey” from “origin of Brain Burst”. Let’s be real here; most people aren’t going to interpret the line like that. My suggestion is far more clear.
14. You only have to look at the English to understand why it’s wrong. You don’t fucking bow to kings. You kneel to them. Well, okay, I guess you can, but in a historical context you’re bowing your head or bowing the knee, not bowing at the waist. I’ll give you this line with the caveat that this is set in Japan and Japanese people don’t have knees.
15.
16.
17.
18. And your line results in an editing derp. Basic gist is it needs to be rephrased.
19. Technically you’re right that the word is older than airplanes, but I guarantee you’re thinking of aviate as related to avian, which it’s not. Aviate (notice the one fucking definition) is a back-formation of aviator (notice the one fucking definition). So you’re still fucking wrong.

Oh, and I’d like to note that when all you do is agree with me for 2/3rds of your rant, you sound honto retarded when you complain about how my reviews are wrong.

thecowgoesmoo says:

13) I’m afraid you’re incorrect on this one. While you can transcend A [noun] — though plural or multiple is preferred; ie, transcending space and time — you CANNOT transcend TO [noun]. Saying that you can “transcend a level and end up at the next” is itself true. HOWEVER you’ve already negated it’s relevance. How? By inserting “end up”. You did not say “transcend at the next” because you know that’s stupid and wrong, and “transcend to” is no less wrong than “transcend at”. So while DS is wrong about the reason for mentioning it, he is right about bringing it up in the first place.

thecowgoesmoo says:

The (13) comment was a reply to Raze.

ar says:

You do know that Aviation has a latin root right?

http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/avis#Latin

Avis means bird, and Aviation forms it’s meaning directly from that. Birds fly, and thus the verb “aviate” simply means “to fly”.

Sure you can say these days it’s typically used to refer to navigating the skies in a mechanical contraption, but don’t you think about why this is so? We do not have wings nor jet packs (yet), so it wouldn’t make sense to use it for us non-aviating folk.

tl;dr The Japs said Aviation is the term they wanted to use and they are 100% correct in using it as they did.

Here, Aviation is clearly intended to mean “To operate and function (by means of physical capability) in the skies.” Thus “And so, the young man aviates.” means he flies in the sky since he himself is a vessel capable of aviation.

thecowgoesmoo says:

@ar: You do know that 13 concerns “transcend” and not “aviate”, right?

ar says:

Blame the replying. It was directed to Dark_fag, not you.

thecowgoesmoo says:

Taking a closer look at this:

1) Discerning the *nuances* of a word by looking at its roots is a questionable practice. All the root tells us is that “aviate” has something to do with flying. It says nothing about its modern use.
2) Both Oxford and Merriam-Webster (both versions this time, thankfully) have similar definitions for aviate:

O – “pilot or fly in an aircraft”
MW – “to navigate in the air, as in an airplane”

The young man is himself capable of flight; there is no disagreement about that. However, it is a mistake to claim that he himself is a vessel of flight. You wouldn’t claim an android equipped with Iron Man-style repulsors an aircraft, would you?

3) This comes down to the age old question of whether fansubbing is about translating the words or getting across the ideas. Certainly, if the Japanese had aviate as part of a catchphrase or other repeated expression, there’d be little reason to rock the boat. But for a one-off, there are other words–words that fit better–to get across both the quirkiness and the indication of flight.

herkz says:

If you call that editing then I can’t imagine how shitty the output 8th produces is. Actually, I can, and I bet it’s pretty close to what you guys released.

ar says:

It can’t be any shittier than the output Commie produces :)

Xythar says:

I guess we’ll find out!

herkz says:

I’m pretty sure unedited pro subs are better than your shit.

Why do you translate it again?

thecowgoesmoo says:

“I’m pretty sure unedited pro subs are better than your shit.”

In this case, maybe. However, I hope you aren’t claiming that to always be true. I think UTW could have done a better job on Dragon Crisis if they had attempted it, for example.

brainchild says:

A+ quality, bro.

thecowgoesmoo says:

re: “intermediate” vs “intermediary” – Strangely enough, Merriam-Webster Online is missing a lot of other definitions for intermediate as a noun. Additionally, most other dictionaries — including Oxford and Dictionary.com, to name the most recognizable ones — have that usage of “intermediate” as secondary, tertiary, or even quaternary definitions.

In fact, right now I am looking at a copy of Merriam-Webster’s Collegiate Dictionary. It does NOT include the definition __ar linked to. Since the online dictionary is only *based* on the Collegiate, I think it’s safe to say that intermediary wins out.

Anonymous says:

Intermediary sounds better and is widely used, but intermediate falls within the bounds of colloquial English.

thecowgoesmoo says:

I’m not saying it’s not technically acceptable, I’m saying that __ar’s link is off and that it isn’t a primary definition, whereas intermediary has the desired meaning as its primary definition.

yashau says:

The video quality is bad for all releases of ep 4 imo. Also, can anyone tell me how WhatStory did on this episode as D_S reviewed their ep 3?

njd09 says:

It’s funny how Hadena’s got the shitty reputation, but I’ve been very pleased with their Accel World. On the other hand, UTW is supposed to be incredible or whatever, and some of these lines are unbearable. “A Headshot for the Rumored Person”? What in the fuck…? Anyway, this didn’t seem as bad as D_S made it seem. I only speak English, and I live in America, so I have an understanding of what is acceptable in the language.

“What was that lag” – Perfectly fine. I have said this before. Not “proper English” technically though. But this is a guy talking, not a fucking professor. It makes sense.

The “was just” overuse wasn’t a big deal really. It’s fine.

“I’m sure you can tell from her attitude when she’s with me.” – Totally fine. I would say this. Nothing wrong. Just the typo in the line after it, “She always get angry”, it should be ‘gets’.

“and whenever we talk about Chiyu…I mean Kurashima, she always…” – Weird. It should be “Chiyu – I mean Kurashima, she always…” He’s correcting himself; a dash makes sense.

“I don’t want to wish for something only to have it crushed later.” – Eh. Doesn’t make much sense. Why is what he wishes for being crushed when he doesn’t even have it? Example: I wish for a car. The non-existent car gets crushed. Well, I never had the car, so why do I care? “I don’t want to wish for something and get it, only to have it crushed later.”

“connection with Cyan Pile” – Connection to Cyan Pile. Sage is on point here.

“through such lengths” – Sage is right. Shit sounds weird. It is “to such lengths”.

“one another” – should be each other.

“I’m your parent” – Keep it, but add a TL note saying how she’s not actually saying that she is his mother, cause it does sound weird. I had to read the comments to understand what they meant.

“Even so, I couldn’t even approach your high score” – Sage is right again, obviously a bad sentence. “Still, I couldn’t even approach your high score.”

“transcend to the next level” – ascend sounds much better. Transcend makes sense, kind of, but “transcend to” sounds fucking dumb. I’ve never heard it used that way, ever. “Transcend the next level” makes sense technically, but I don’t like transcend here at all. Ascend to the next level.

“reach the origin” – This isn’t bad. However, as Sage said, discover is better.

“I want to bow before the future king.” – Sage, you kind of sound stupid here, no offense. Bow, kneel, who cares? You can bow to kings – bowing is a gesture of respect. There is absolutely nothing wrong with this.

“several ten seconds” – At this point, I would feel bad for watching this. Really bad.

“Is the machine connected to the cable stand-alone?” – This sounds weird as fuck. Never heard this before. And the machine is connected to the cable? That’s awkward. “Is the cable connected only to the machine?”

“that guy is likely to be Cyan Pile.” – No. “it’s likely to be Cyan Pile.” And “activating the acceleration command” is fucking robotic. As Sage said, it should be Acceleration. Or, more simply, “if someone here accelerates, it’s likely to be Cyan Pile.”

“Everything will be decided in an instant, before he challenges her to a duel.” – This is correct. It will be decided before he challenges her, because that’s when Haru (fat guy) is coming in. It will already be decided by the time he challenges her – he can’t challenge her until after he beats Haru.

“Everyone in our school will have heard of the accident” – I think this is fine. I could be wrong, but this sounds okay to me. I have said things like this before.

“And so the young man aviates.” – I don’t give a fuck when the word came out, everyone here in America associates “aviation” with airplanes. You can say soar. “And so, the young man soars.” The comma is not necessary, but I like it a lot more that way.

I haven’t watched this release (it seems watchable), but I wouldn’t watch it now that I’ve seen these screenshots. Definitely the worst Accel World script I’ve seen so far. I’ll stick with Hadena, they’re fast, and quite watchable.

herkz says:

Hadena actually has slightly competent editors. Problem is you can’t really trust their translations.

Irie Naoki says:

I admit that I am no expert with the English language but about

“I don’t want to wish for something only to have it crushed later.”

for me it does sound okey, its the same as not wanting to wishing for a girlfriend because you will only be sad and heartbroken when it ends.
It has the same meaning there, he does not want to wish for something cause he knows that its going to be crushes later on.

For me, not a native English speaker that is how I think the line sounds like.
You don’t want a brand new car knowing its gonna be crushed in the near future.

blargh says:

Hope is crushed, not wishes.

8thSin says:

My care level for this show is relatively low, and this is technically unedited. I think Kusion was busy that week and didn’t even look at the script, so I didn’t expect our English to be all that great.
I just want to clarify a few things that haven’t been clarified already.

I tend to use ellipsis for incomplete sentences and long pauses. Em-dash for forced cutoff by another character or by surprise.
It’s stylistic thing I stick to, and I find it to be easier to read.

“Connection with Cyan Pile” shouldn’t have been taken literally. I guess that was a poor phrasing, and it should’ve been “involvement” instead.

“Parent” is a key teminology in the series said in English. It doesn’t matter if the word there was “bitch” instead. You don’t translate these.
“Aviate” one was said in Japanese, so it’s more arguable. It technically sounds awkwawrd IMO too, but that’s the preview quirk they have in every episode (the title is always repeated in a sentence), and if that’s an English error, then there’s nothing I can do about that.

“Transcend to the next level” wasn’t supposed to be taken literally. It means reach somewhere no one ever reached before in context. Not the specific level, 10.

Xythar says:

It should still be “ascend to the next level” in that context.

8thSin says:

Yeah, should’ve been ascend.

thecowgoesmoo says:

Xythar is right: transcend just doesn’t belong in this context. Surpass is close enough that you can use it as a sanity check; you wouldn’t ever say “surpass to the next level”. As I said before to… I don’t remember who and can’t be bothered to figure it out–you can transcend something, but you can’t transcend to a something.

blargh says:

I agree.

herkz says:

Why do you even translate it then? I mean, I know why, but it’s a pretty stupid reason.

Dark_Sage says:

If it’s a preview quirk, then the shitty English isn’t your fault. Noted.

FalseDawn says:

This is more a query than anything else to do with transcend: I’m sure I’ve heard the phrase “transcend to the next state of being” when spiritual nonsense is involved like nirvana and reincarnation, etc. So, while I’m not entirely defending the line they used transcend in(I think it’s awkward as hell too and there is a logic error in there somewhere), doesn’t it somewhat work as a mimicked construction?

Xythar says:

That should be ascend as well, surely?

You can transcend something, but you can’t transcend to something.

vagoo says:

Ascend definately feels more correct. With bothering to look up any literal difenitions, usage tends to replace “overcome” in a sort of superlative (hyperbolobic?, not an english major) manner, or something similar, i.e. he transcended the barrier and reached enlightement, or such. On that a purely USAGE standpoint, it’s generally only used for in the past tense when attempting to speak in grandiose terms, not that I’d hold anyone to hard to that standard.

vagoo says:

*without, derp

vagoo says:

keep drinking and don’t worry about it

vagoo says:

Meant that as a joyful reply before realizing it might come off as condescending. However, I’ll stand by ‘ascend’ to the death!

Raggers says:

Alright, this is for all you who are arguing about the line:

“Everything will be decided in an instant, before he challenges her to a duel.”

As someone already said, he means he has to challenge Cyan Pile just before he challenges Princess Snow Black. There there is a pretty simple fix:

“Everything will be decided in the instant before he challenges her to a duel.”

Oh wow. Ambiguity cleared. And it reads a lot better than the original.

Mahjong says:

That’s some voodoo shit right there.

Godcore says:

This didn’t create as much drama as I thought it would. Guess that means UTW acknowledged their mistakes and just moved on.

jdp says:

Are you looking at the same web page as I am?

Godcore says:

I was expecting more UTW staff to come here and defend their release. That post from Raze was, as D_S said, just him agreeing to most of the critiques he made. ar’s an encoder, and not even a native English speaker, so his arguments are moot.

Man, now what do I do with all this popcorn?

ar says:

Wow, you sure are a misinformed fool.

Not a native speaker you say?

I’ve probably been speaking English longer than you’ve been living. This might be the internet, but that’s no excuse for being publicly stupid.

Bubu says:

So, being Australian isnt native engrish naw?

kokujin-kun says:

Ya know what, when I see screenshots like this:

http://bit.ly/Jt6WtW

I begin to wonder if the word “oya” actually means “pet owner”.

AppleJack says:

UTW should hire more editors or drop some of their projects. That should fix all of the problems.

sleepy920 says:

They only do at least 3 projects a season.

Nevreen says:

Half a dozen people doing 3 projects a season is a fair amount of work. I’m too busy/lazy to work on more than 2 projects at a time.

ar says:

Well we only really work on 2 each. Raze is the only one who is working on a 3rd project at the moment.

I agree that working on more than 2 is a lot of work, and I honestly don’t have that much free time so that’s my limit.

I’m also working on Nisemonogatari BDs along with Raze and a couple of others, but I wouldn’t count that as an active project, it’s more of a thing we’re doing on the side when we have some spare time.

Plus, finding staff who are capable, competent, reliable and not retarded is really hard.

brainchild says:

>Plus, finding staff who are capable, competent, reliable and not retarded is really hard.
:D

Nevreen says:

>reliable

God, I need to stop procrastinating on these releases.

Xythar says:

Eh, I think reliability in this case isn’t about procrastinating on stuff that has no set deadline. More about turning up for stuff you commit to.

FalseDawn says:

Have to admit, I don’t think I’ve ever met an editor who’s both competent AND reliable. It’s unheard of.

Xythar says:

You’re talking to him.

>_>

FalseDawn says:

I said competent…

(Okay, I may have set that one up just so I could knock it down. So sue me :D)

Xythar says:

You’ll hear from my lawyer!

phillip says:

Hey Dark Sage is there going to be any reviews tonight, because I request a Commie version review

Zetman says:

What’s the final verdict on this one? Which group can I kick back to watch this with the least amount of errors?

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