Normally I wouldn’t even touch this release with my ten-foot penis, but some people out there were thirsty enough to download these subs, so I guess the jeans are coming off.
When I say “some people”, I mean 4900 and counting.
Funimation licensed a lot of titles this season, but due to either malice or stupidity (neither would surprise me), they decided to delay their “simulcasts” this week.
Because of licensing agreements, this means that everyone who likes to watch shows on-time, and prefers their subs in English, has to: watch a different language translation, wait for a decent English fansub group to pick the show up, or worse.
See, some fucktards from the German fansubbing scene thought it would be a great idea to translate the German simulcast subs into English. Yeah, that’s Japanese -> German -> English.
And considering the quality of the German translation…
…it’s basically a worst-case human centipede.
So what you’re about to see shouldn’t shock you too much.
They’re flowers, not beets. Bit of an embearrassing start, but I’m sure Anon will come through.
Onomatopoeic translation is beary hard to screw up. Essentially, you have to come up with a word that sounds nothing like what’s being said in Japanese or what would be said in English.
Well, leave it to the Germans.
Much like the TL’s forebears, I bet it came over from the east side.
Ich’m afraid the damage has already bearn done.
Could you even come up with a dumbear translation?
Kumaria sounds like something I’d drink. And this Engrish seems like a bearitable excuse to drink one.
The release only gets bearable when you dramatically pause before each misplaced comma. Bonus points if you incorporate raising your eyebrows at arbeartrarily placed, imaginary cameras.
…screw you. Don’t judge my coping mechanisms.
Well this is a surprise! I think this may be the first original translation for “ganbearre” that I’ve ever seen. Points for trying at least. …And negative ones for failing so terribly.
You is a gift that keeps on giving, Anonymous. Didn’t know there was a class bearlow low, but you’re representing it exceptionally well.
No thanks. Hate to be the bearer of bad news, but I prefer seaweed with my sushi.
Half the lines in the release are fucking stock — you could leave them untranslated and most people would understand what’s going on. So when you translate them incorrectly, well it’s not exactly a huge confidence bearster, Anon-kun.
“Why are you being so mean?” is what you wanted.
First off, what the fuck is a fish pie? Secondly, don’t fucking answer that, because I don’t want to know.
Fucking hell, TL-kun. You do realize that this release is bearsically a crime against humanity, right? I don’t wanna imply anything about your people, but I imagine you’ve gone over in class why that’s not exactly a good thing. …right?
Ellipsis placement… language choice… TL-kun’s only bearying himself deeper with each line.
Is this supposed to bearly be English? Because while I always appreciate devotion to a joke, it’s getting a bit old, Anon.
Where do I even beargin? It’s like Romeo & Juliet, as performed by the translator’s special ed class.
Thanks to Anon’s delibearate assault, I think we all became victoms today.
I’m starting to understand why no tolerance policies exist. And eugenics. And euthanasia.
Turns out, TL-kun’s a rather solid cultural ambearssador. Sounds like a good back-up plan, since the TL gig probably isn’t gonna pan out.
You know what else would fit pretty well? TL-kun in a trash compactor. Bet if he tries it out, he’ll find a place he truly bearlongs!
The further I get into the release, the more I feel the cancerous Engrish bearing down on me.
Every fucking line bearates my ears with stupid. I don’t even know how I’ve gotten this far without medication.
We Italian now? Hell, we’re just one “w” away from Kenshiro. Keep going TL-kun, this level of trans-ethnic stupidity is a bear gift!
Are you just randomly throwing a bearrage of words from a dollar-store dictionary onto the screen?
Am I just asking rhetorical questions?
Ignoring the heterosexual imagery– …actually, sorry. I can’t ignore that. Let’s bearrel forward to the next line.
After this release, I only wish I could remembear what love is.
Fuck you, TL-kun. I can’t just grin and tolerate it anymore. I’m out.
Rating: F-. No, wait. F- -. Eat a ten-footer, Anon.