Winter 2014 W7-31: The Animeathon

This post was written by Dark_Sage. He is Dark_Sage.

Twitter    


To be straight with ya, I don’t think I’ve watched more than 10 episodes total in the past few weeks. Luckily, I have my imagination.

All episodic summaries are considered valid up to episode 9.

 

Buddy Complex

No one deserves the pain of watching through this shit show
Disappointment: the anime.

Between this and Gundam Build Fighters, it seems like Japan’s trying to kill off the mech genre. Can’t really blame them, though; they’ve been at it for decades now and have to be getting dead tired of it all.

But maybe they could see it in them to make the transition just a tad less painful.

1/10.

 

Buddyfight

Continuing its weird crossover with One Piece, Buddyfight sinks Japan’s love of the Gummy Gum Crew to new depths.

The animation is top-notch, but the plot integration is lacking.
The animation is top-notch, but the plot integration is lacking.

As Buddyfight’s ratings rise, it appears Japan’s obsession with failure will last until another generation finally breeds out the radiation. :(

1/10.

 

Chuunibyou demo Koi ga Shitai! Ren

I'm convinced only virgins could enjoy this show
Another 3 seasons and we might see some actual relationship development. Better keep the funding flowing!

If this show pandered any harder to otaku, the blu-ray set would come with a fleshlight.

1/10.

 

D-Frag!

Japan hasn’t made a funny anime since Full Metal Panic Fumoffu, so I don’t see why they’d start now.

Funimation Can't Spell
Haha, she made a silly face! Pure comedy!

Are the Japanese born without the humor gene or something? This is getting ridiculous.

1/10.

 

Hamtaro Season 2

Psycho-Pass_x_Darker_Than_Black.mkv continues to prove Nipponia will find a way to ruin any interesting premise it gets its hands on.

Lies

Japan’s literacy rates can’t be above 10% if it’s this hard to find a good writer.

1/10.

 

HappinessCharge PreCure!

I don't remember watching this.
I don’t remember watching this.

One of the best sleeping aids ever developed.

10/10.

 

Hoozuki no Reitetsu

What a punchline!
What a punchline!

The only thing worse than this show is realizing that some people actually like it.

1/10.

 

ImoCho – Recently, My Sister is Unusual

If I wanted to see bitches cry I'd write another Commie review.
If I wanted to see bitches cry, I’d write another Commie review.

The characters in this show are so terrible that during the ecchi sequences even my dick refuses to give them any consideration.

1/10.

 

Inari, Konkon, Koi Iroha

LOVE

It may have slightly overstayed its welcome already, but I don’t see any other shoujo to watch this season. 10/10 by virtue of filling that slot.

 

Mahou Sensou – Magical Warfare

I haven’t bathed in a week and my ballsack is still fresher than this show’s story. It’s like Japan took a paint-by-numbers guide to plot and just threw a bucket of paint on it, figuring it’d work out.

It worked out about as well as my attempt to save money on hair gel.
Yeah, it worked out about as well as my attempt to save money on hair gel.

1/10.

 

Mikakunin de Shinkoukei

The bestiality lobby must love this show for showing such a cute relationship between the two MCs.

Take the knot
“Take the knot.”

Sweet/10.

 

Nisekoi

"Herpaladerpala I need to die"
“Herpaladerpala I need to die”

Shaft’s grand experiment to see if anime fans have any value as human beings has resulted in a resounding no. You only have yourselves to blame for what’s about to come.

1/10.

 

No-Rin

I don't give a shit

Who put this plot in my ecchi salad?

1/10.

 

Nobunaga the Fool

Waterfall training? How novel!
Waterfall training? How novel!

It’s time for an intervention, Japan. Find another time period to write about. Surely the Sengoku Era wasn’t the only time in history you guys did anything interesting.

How about a WW2 anime? Maybe make it an ecchi series. I’m thinking “Nanking Cherries” would be an apt title.

1/10.

 

Nobunagun

This show’s idea train never left the episode 1 station. Apparently the creative staff jumped on the tracks and refused to leave.

They've had the same exact enemy for 9 fucking episodes
They’ve had the same exact enemy for 9 fucking episodes. Seriously.

Shoulda gone with the bumpy ride option, Nobunagun. At least that way there’d have been some development.

1/10.

 

Noragami

So this is what Bones did with Space Dandy's budget.
So this is what Bones did with Space Dandy’s character development budget.

It’s okay enough.

10/10.

 

Sakura Trick

It’s been nine dates and these dykes still haven’t had sex. This show’s like a how-to guide for failed relationships.

Yuzuru's so sexually deprived her eyes are starting to be affected.
Hell, Yuu’s so sexually deprived her eyes are starting to be affected.

You know what Sakura Trick really needs? Some goddamn comic relief. Like a fucking ninja or monkey-bear to break up the boring.

Nin_Nin
Yeah, sure.

You could have him interrupt all the lovey-dovey scenes with his stupid fucking bullshit so there’s at least a reasonable excuse for why these chicks aren’t fencing with their clits. Really, anything works. All I’m asking for is some goddamn realism here.

1/10.

 

Sekai Seifuku – Bouryaku no Zvezda

You know what? No, it’s not a good show. It really fucking isn’t. But fuck it, 9 episodes of mindless self indulgence is better than one episode of Vampire Weekend.

It's okay. You can like me for my wit AND my body.
It’s okay, ladies. You can like me for my wit and my body.

Okay, that analogy didn’t really work, but seriously, fuck Vampire Weekend.

10/10.

 

Space Dandy

Space Derpy
Space Derpy more like.

If you’re still waiting for it to get good, I hope you realize you’ve been waiting for nine episodes.

1/10.

 

Super Sonico the Animation

9 eps in and no lesbian oil massage.

I'd rather be getting off.
I’d rather be getting off.

DOA/10.

 

Toaru Hikuushi e no Koiuta – The Pilot’s Love Song

Filler characters plz go

Why are these people still alive? Way to take all that potential and fly it into the ground, Japan.

1/10.

 

Wake Up, Girls!

bggfldfgkdfgkjldfg
plz no more

With characters that have less value than McDonald’s meat and a plot more juvenile than a lolicon’s fap material, I can only assume this show is trying to be as bad as it is. I guess as a means of proving a terrible point, ala the School Days style of direction?

Too bad I don’t see a nice boat in these girls’ futures.

1/10.

 

Witch Craft Works

Sleeper hit of the season

The main characters are terrible, but these five nee-chans are good enough to redeem the show. I demand a spinoff series.

10/10.

 

Wizard Barristers – Benmashi Cecil

This show is more navel-gazing than Drunk_Sage on a Natasha kick.

Anorexia is better in anime than real life
Dat anorexia~

That isn’t necessarily a problem in and of itself, but the bellybutton they’re looking at is infected with a cancerous overgrowth of an unrealized premise and characters with personalities formed in a gastric tract.

Thanks, but I’ll stick with the white Russian.

1/10.

 

Z/X Ignition

This is supposed to be 720p

God awful. For reals, how do you fuck up a card game adaptation?

1/10.

 

 

Thoughts, Graphed

Temp_Graph_6_3D+2D

I switched up the color scheme a bit to help you differentiate between the series. Hopefully this provides a better sense of how scores changed over time.

75 thoughts on “Winter 2014 W7-31: The Animeathon”

  1. Nice tastes.

    I’m surprised you’re not watching the second season of Silver Spoon. Are you reading the manga, by any chance?

    Reply
        • You really don’t need to try and defend yourself on this one, Kurt. As many of the people who’ve seen/read it will attest to, it’s funny, informative and thoughtful. Any one who would state that you’re being sarcastic about Silver Spoon of all things is probably just trolling for a reaction anyway.

          Reply
      • The problem is that it’s the only thing that’s well-written this season. (Well, not a problem for -me-, because it’s the only thing I’m actually interested in watching this season.)

        Reply
  2. Wow, what’s with this humor floating between all the shit on the sewerage level.
    People should really demand smart-money for reading this.

    0/10.

    Reply
  3. Pretty much the same for me. Plus Space Dandy minus WCW. I’m stuck at exactly the same Hamatora episode and reluctant to continue.

    Reply
  4. Why are these people still alive? Way to take all that potential and fly it into the ground, Japan.

    Well, the best characters did fly into the ground/blew up. Does that count? :[

    TL;DR: everything is shit pretty much, right?

    Reply
  5. Zvezda is fun and interesting, it’s a shame Okamura Tensai had to provide such an awful concept. Poor Meteo is doing all he can to keep it interesting.

    Here’s hoping it DOESN’T get a 2nd cour so Meteo can go back to writing Girl’s Work. At this point, they’ve pretty much let all the hype die, so at least they won’t be forced into pandering to that crowd. Then again, Kinoko Nasu is the producer… Good fucking lord Meteo, get better jobs.

    Reply
  6. Ha ha Dark_Sage look how shit your taste is. This season is actually really good and here’s why:
    Imouto no Watersports: cute + lewd sister anime. This one comes out every other season and it’s always good. B+.
    Gin no Saji S2: It was good the first time and now Aki-chan wants the D, but she’s still cute??. A-
    Onee-chan ga Kita: aww yiss more sister anime. Only this time, it’s an older sister? The only thing better than a smitten imouto is a lustful aneki. Solid A.
    Sekai Seifuku: What the hell? I thought this was going to be about school uniforms. There is a distinct lack of sailor suits (problematic). Cute girls though, so it’s a B+.
    Sakura Trick: Buy the BDs so we can get more yuri (this show sucks but maybe if we throw money at it we’ll get something better). It’s bad and those girls are too lewd (kissu is for the last episode only) but I’m going to pretend I like it so A+.

    I guess some other anime exists also but no one decent is subbing Sonico and the WuG girls are mean. I’m not watching anything else (except some from last season) Well that’s my review I hope you liked it.

    Reply
    • WAit I forgot, there’s also D-frag. The imouto is cute and so is class-prez-chan. Watch the anime, because the manga is still ongoing and scanlators suck. Okay now I’m done.

      Reply
        • Well Ryuk I posted this comment because he claims that good anime is bad, when actually it is good. It is also notable that he thinks Sakura Trick should be lewder; in fact, holding hands and blushing and being awkward is superior to kissing or, worse, sex, because it’s cuter. With these points taken into consideration, I decided to enlighted the author regarding the actual quality of currently airing anime. Hopefully this has helped you to understand the point.

          Reply
            • Somebody said that there were more airing anime than ever before (don’t know if thats true, sure doesn’t seem like that).
              But as of now I am watching less airing anime than ever since I startet following the airing seasons. I don’t know anymore, either this season is just really bad, or anime is getting worse in general, or I’m getting too old for this shit. Series like ‘Strike the blood’ just don’t do it for me anymore after watching nearly the same thing every season before.

              Reply
              • There are more series airing than ever before. I mean, not every single year sees an increase in the number of series released (in particular, there was a dip around 2010), but the overall trend is that its increasing.

                I don’t think anime really getting worse (at least not overall, despite how annoying some modern trends can be). It’s more likely that you just don’t like it as much as you used to. Before, it took less effort to find the stuff you wanted to watch. Now, with more and more series airing each year, you have to dig through more and more of the same mediocrity to find what interests you. The “good stuff” might just not seem worth it to you anymore after digging through season after season, year after year.

                That being said, anime could certainly stand to be a little less inward-looking. It’s an unfortunate tendency for high-cost mediums in particular.

                Reply
  7. You know what? ImoCho for AotS. At least with ImoCho I’m curious about what’ll happen next. I mean, I’m never going to watch the second episode, but I WANT to. Sort of. In a manner of speaking.

    Reply
    • That show isn’t nearly as bad as people make it out to be. At the very least, it’s got more unique ideas and better characters than Nisekoi, although, the same can be said about any puppet show. In all seriousness, though, the main character is the step-sister, not the brother, and the plot at least tries to explain why she acts the way she does, and the relationships she has with other characters do move forward. It’s simply not the full-on porno fest that people are making it out to be.

      Reply
  8. I can’t wait to watch Commie rape these with their terrible subs, and then watch on Nyaatorrent for that Penguin Fever guy to relentlessly defend them because their dick is lodged too far into his ass.

    On a different note, I actually like Space Dandy…

    Reply
  9. So basically, you hate every single one anime of the season. Kakkoii, this means there still are some sane people in the community ;p

    Reply
  10. I need a review on Nisekoi. FFF has recently started subbing Nisekoi on a weekly basis, and I need to know if the quality has dropped with their current speed.

    Reply
    • Yeah, reviews… Hmm… I wouldn’t really hold my breath for that. The season’s ending so soon that I’ll only get under a handful out before I need to switch gears.

      Reply
    • Sorry, pretty much dropped the shit out of this season and there’s no looking back. The future awaits us now, Nora. And it will be more or less futuristical.

      Reply
  11. “Japan hasn’t made a funny anime since Full Metal Panic Fumoffu, so I don’t see why they’d start now.”

    Did you completely skip Tonari no Seki-kun? It’s one of the funniest things I’ve seen.

    Reply

Leave a Reply to Nora Cancel reply