Fansub Review: [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Episode 01)

Fansub Review: [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Episode 01)

This post was written by Dark_Sage. He is Dark_Sage.

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And here we are with Commie’s release. I heard the TL was supposed to be amazing, so let’s see how great this release actually is.

Table of Contents

Release Information

Visual Quality

Script Quality

Results

Release Information

Episode details.

Release format: MKV (264 MB, 10-bit)

Japanesiness: No honorifics.

English style: American English.

Encoding details: http://pastebin.com/635qupny

Speed: Slow (>48 hours)

 

External links.

Group website: http://commiesubs.com/

IRC channel: #[email protected]

SubCompare screenshot comparisons: N/A

Commie’s fansub reviews: N/A.

 

Visual Review

Karaoke.

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_03.20_[2013.01.01_19.11.28]

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_03.52_[2013.01.01_19.10.25]

Opening. Cute. The colors change when necessary and the font is generally a good match.

Rating: Okay+.

 

 

Typesetting.

You know the drill. Tons of signs in the spoiler if you wanna see them.

Spoiler:

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_00.01_[2013.01.01_17.36.48] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_00.02_[2013.01.01_17.37.05] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_00.05_[2013.01.01_17.37.18] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_00.06_[2013.01.01_17.37.34] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_00.06_[2013.01.01_17.37.39] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_00.07_[2013.01.01_17.37.24] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_00.09_[2013.01.01_17.37.51] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_00.12_[2013.01.01_17.38.03] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_00.13_[2013.01.01_17.38.32] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_00.15_[2013.01.01_17.40.07] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_00.18_[2013.01.01_17.40.21] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_00.23_[2013.01.01_17.47.48] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_00.23_[2013.01.01_17.47.58] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_00.26_[2013.01.01_17.49.31] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_00.26_[2013.01.01_17.49.41] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_00.28_[2013.01.01_17.49.50] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_00.32_[2013.01.01_17.50.27] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_00.33_[2013.01.01_17.50.48] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_00.33_[2013.01.01_17.50.56] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_00.34_[2013.01.01_17.50.33] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_00.34_[2013.01.01_17.51.03] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_00.35_[2013.01.01_17.51.23] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_00.35_[2013.01.01_17.51.44] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_00.36_[2013.01.01_17.51.50] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_00.38_[2013.01.01_17.51.59] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_00.39_[2013.01.01_17.52.24] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_00.42_[2013.01.01_17.52.31] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_00.51_[2013.01.01_17.52.47] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_00.56_[2013.01.01_17.53.13] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_01.00_[2013.01.01_17.53.21] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_01.02_[2013.01.01_17.53.27] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_01.06_[2013.01.01_17.53.41] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_01.07_[2013.01.01_17.53.48] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_01.07_[2013.01.01_17.53.52] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_01.10_[2013.01.01_17.54.06] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_01.14_[2013.01.01_17.54.13] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_01.15_[2013.01.01_17.54.19] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_01.19_[2013.01.01_17.54.30] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_01.22_[2013.01.01_17.54.38] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_01.22_[2013.01.01_17.55.00] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_01.28_[2013.01.01_17.55.18] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_01.45_[2013.01.01_17.56.32] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_01.54_[2013.01.01_18.01.46] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_01.55_[2013.01.01_18.01.28] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_01.55_[2013.01.01_18.02.14] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_01.57_[2013.01.01_18.02.20] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_02.11_[2013.01.01_18.02.59] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_02.54_[2013.01.01_18.57.36] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_04.31_[2013.01.01_19.24.08] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_04.34_[2013.01.01_19.24.21] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_04.34_[2013.01.01_19.24.33] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_05.08_[2013.01.01_19.26.44] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_05.36_[2013.01.01_19.27.51] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_05.52_[2013.01.01_19.28.14] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_06.10_[2013.01.01_19.28.40] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_06.36_[2013.01.01_19.29.45] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_06.46_[2013.01.01_19.30.10] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_06.46_[2013.01.01_19.30.17] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_06.52_[2013.01.01_19.30.38] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_06.54_[2013.01.01_19.34.50] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_06.56_[2013.01.01_19.35.10] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_07.05_[2013.01.01_19.36.06] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_08.14_[2013.01.01_19.38.30] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_09.30_[2013.01.01_19.49.46] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_09.32_[2013.01.01_19.49.51] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_09.33_[2013.01.01_19.49.57] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_09.52_[2013.01.01_19.50.40] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_10.15_[2013.01.01_19.51.15] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_10.20_[2013.01.01_19.51.27] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_10.32_[2013.01.01_19.51.53] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_10.53_[2013.01.01_19.52.32] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_11.19_[2013.01.01_19.53.09] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_11.42_[2013.01.01_19.55.25] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_11.44_[2013.01.01_19.55.54] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_11.53_[2013.01.01_19.56.48] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_11.55_[2013.01.01_19.57.52] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_13.39_[2013.01.01_20.07.19] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_14.06_[2013.01.01_20.08.51] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_14.42_[2013.01.01_20.13.56] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_15.15_[2013.01.01_20.14.56] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_16.54_[2013.01.01_20.20.56] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_16.57_[2013.01.01_20.21.21] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_17.27_[2013.01.01_20.22.18] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_17.33_[2013.01.01_20.22.51] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_17.45_[2013.01.01_20.23.29] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_21.35_[2013.01.01_20.41.04] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_22.55_[2013.01.01_20.46.04] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_22.57_[2013.01.01_20.46.11] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_23.00_[2013.01.01_20.46.53] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_24.48_[2013.01.01_20.49.56]

Dat ecchi~

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_11.42_[2013.01.01_19.55.33] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_11.43_[2013.01.01_19.55.40] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_11.46_[2013.01.01_19.56.02]   [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_11.50_[2013.01.01_19.56.34]  [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_15.21_[2013.01.01_20.15.07] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_15.23_[2013.01.01_20.15.14] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_15.24_[2013.01.01_20.15.20] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_16.43_[2013.01.01_20.19.32] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_16.43_[2013.01.01_20.19.37] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_16.47_[2013.01.01_20.19.52] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_17.47_[2013.01.01_20.23.36] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_24.17_[2013.01.01_20.48.52]

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_00.55_[2013.01.01_17.53.05] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_01.04_[2013.01.01_17.53.33] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_01.08_[2013.01.01_17.53.58] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_06.30_[2013.01.01_19.29.34] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_06.54_[2013.01.01_19.34.41] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_06.55_[2013.01.01_19.34.58] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_08.23_[2013.01.01_19.44.28] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_10.29_[2013.01.01_19.51.44] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_12.06_[2013.01.01_19.58.44] [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_14.09_[2013.01.01_20.12.53]

This is a fairly representative sample of the signs in this release. Of all the groups, Commie had the most signs typeset.

 

 

Other.

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_17.45_[2013.01.01_20.23.21]

It’s not the greatest of encodes, no. Honestly, you should probably fire your encoder and have RHE do it instead. Why not use your best on a show like Neko?

 

Script Review

Main Script.

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_00.03_[2013.01.01_17.37.12]

Commie’s typeset doesn’t match the script here, and this is a common issue in the release. You can play it off as a stylistic choice and swear that the mismatch was intentional. That I could buy… if you did it all the time.

Instead, it matched half the time and didn’t match the other half. The only consistency was the inconsistency.

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_00.18_[2013.01.01_17.41.16]

Uhh, what? Do you know what “blood curl” means? It’s when you get so frightened your blood starts to coagulate (though not literally). The term is entirely associated with fear, not beauty.

If you were trying to intelligently get across a juxtaposition of fear and attraction, you utterly and completely failed. You should have been playing around with dual meanings in that case. “hellishly beautiful” is one that came to the top of my mind. And really, if you don’t know what the fuck an intensifier is, you should not be subbing this show.

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_00.21_[2013.01.01_17.45.16]

What? “scars were shared”? Is this a documentary of Gibberishfest 2013 or something?

Edit: Apparently “scars” is a direct translation and refers back to Kizumonogatari. I still think it’s a stupid line, but I’ll give you that viewpoint.

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_01.46_[2013.01.01_17.57.43]

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_01.50_[2013.01.01_17.56.48]

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_01.51_[2013.01.01_17.57.10]

“Of those nine golden days,”

would be a far better choice of words there. You know, to change it to something that makes sense.

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_02.23_[2013.01.01_18.03.59]

Have you heard of matching your tenses? woke->wake OR go->went.

Also, “It’s unfathomable.”? Sure have issues representing character in your scripts, dontcha? Try “unforgivable”.

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_02.37_[2013.01.01_18.05.34]

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_02.41_[2013.01.01_18.54.34]

>translating “yandere” as “sadist”

Yeah, okay.

For those of you not wap enough to know what “yandere” means, it’s essentially a character type where the character is crazy with love for another, emphasis on the crazy. Yanderes will go to extreme lengths, often in the murder department, to get rid of anything that stands in between them and their target of affection. Sometimes this even means killing the target of affection and fucking the dead body. Yanderes gonna yandere.

Translating it as “sadist” completely removes the “insanity” piece. And it makes it out like yanderes get sexual gratification from hurting people. Which, as a whole, they don’t.

If you must translate it (and I think that’s a fucking stupid idea, but whatever), translate it properly. “so I wanted to try out being a psycho lover.” You can still play off that with “You forgot the ‘love’ part!”

Otherwise you’re just making shit up.

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_04.42_[2013.01.01_19.25.20]

A veteran of love? Are you calling Tsukihi a slut, Commie?

Seriously poor choice of words there. Just use “and your friends likely ask you for advice about love because you have a boyfriend”. Or really, anything that gets away from using “veteran”.

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_06.53_[2013.01.01_19.34.31]

A bit of, let’s say, a bit of repetition never hurt anybody!

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_07.48_[2013.01.01_19.37.56]

You should use en-dashes in place of the commas here because both “When” and “At what stage” are alternate beginnings for the sentence and commas don’t indicate this. But that’s not the biggest problem here. Keep reading. The following are all part of the same conversation:

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_07.56_[2013.01.01_19.39.07]

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_07.59_[2013.01.01_19.39.14]

“Well, I did, somehow.” does NOT fucking answer the “When did you decide you were in love with him?” question. The question necessitates a when response, not a “Well, I did, somehow.” response.

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_08.01_[2013.01.01_19.40.43]

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_08.02_[2013.01.01_19.40.52]

This doesn’t follow. It doesn’t follow at-fucking-all.

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_08.04_[2013.01.01_19.40.58]

No, it’s not!

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_08.05_[2013.01.01_19.41.03]

My brain completely shut down while trying to follow that conversation.

Commie, take note: your viewers’ brains should not shut down while watching your releases.

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_08.27_[2013.01.01_19.44.49]

It honestly pains me to describe these errors because it means I have to admit that humans are capable of such atrocities against the English language.

Let’s take this apart.

I wondered if I loved him <- Fine.

if I felt I did <- No, and here’s why: This line is the same as “I wondered if I felt I loved him” because of its placement in that sentence’s list. And when you look at that line, it’s quite obvious it’s 100% wrong.

The third part — if I realized I did — is fine, because it translates as “I wondered if I realized I loved him”, which is English (though admittedly awkward, but if I pointed out all the awkward lines in this release we’d be here all day).

Honestly, I think a full re-write is necessary.

“I wondered about whether or not I loved him. And when I thought about it, I realized I did love him.” <- You could probably write this up with wordplay but I’m about five seconds away from pounding a nail into my skull to stop this splitting headache brought on by Commie’s release, so I’m not gonna go that route.

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_09.01_[2013.01.01_19.45.43]

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_09.05_[2013.01.01_19.46.06]

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_09.10_[2013.01.01_19.46.20]

When the first time I’m impressed is 9 minutes in with what is likely a direct translation, that’s not exactly good.

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_12.50_[2013.01.01_20.01.11]

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_12.53_[2013.01.01_20.01.19]

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_12.56_[2013.01.01_20.01.25]

A-tier script, Commie. You deserve a round of applause and perhaps a round of shots laced with cyanide.

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_13.26_[2013.01.01_20.06.50]

That English-like sentence.

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_15.00_[2013.01.01_20.14.23]

It’s actually “pent-up”, but I guess missing dashes are the least of your worries in this script.

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_15.32_[2013.01.01_20.15.36]

Oh come the fuck on. Do they not teach kids what colons are in schools these days? Or do they leave that up to the kids’ drunk fathers?

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_16.39_[2013.01.01_20.18.55]

Comma abuse! Call the comma police!

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_18.37_[2013.01.01_20.26.11]

are

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_18.45_[2013.01.01_20.26.34]

There we go! Topical translations. I knew you could do it.

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_18.49_[2013.01.01_20.26.52]

Oh Commie, this is one of the very, very, very, very few things I hate about you. Translating words said in English into different languages because… Well, I don’t think they have any decent reasons for it.

I get that you’re uncomfortable with English, but please try to bear with it. You’ll get the hang of the language in no time.

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_19.04_[2013.01.01_20.34.51]

You might not have siblings, sure,

Please try to get the basics right.

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_20.09_[2013.01.01_20.37.58]

This doesn’t say a damned thing and could be filler’d guesslation for all I know.

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_19.45_[2013.01.01_20.37.21]

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_19.48_[2013.01.01_20.37.28]

Absolutely brilliant. Get whoever was in charge of these lines a gift certificate to their local asian massage parlor. They deserve to get off like I did when I read this.

This works perfectly at the start and then by the final screen takes the pun elevator up another ten levels.

[Commie] Nekomonogatari (Black) - 01 [1B0402DF].mkv_snapshot_22.22_[2013.01.01_20.45.03]

Extremely well placed for the mood/setting. This is one of the examples of occasional intelligence in the script. There were a few more, but they weren’t anything to write home about.

 

 

Results

Watchability: Watchable.

Visual grade: A+ (we’ll forget about the encode)

Script grade: D+ (D- when you factor in http://crymore.net/2013/01/03/fansub-review-addendum-commie-nekomonogatari-episode-01/)

Overall grade: C+ (original, canon), C- (after a second pass)

The visuals in Commie’s release put them quite a bit ahead of pem’s release. But the script was ultimately a miss in more ways than one. Stupid phrasing combined with a generally boring script is not what we should be subject to in a -monogatari release.
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65 thoughts on “Fansub Review: [Commie] Nekomonogatari (Episode 01)”

  1. For the “a monster beautiful enough to make one’s blood curl”, as I understand the original line is literally “beautiful enough to freeze the blood”. It seems like a pretty good interpretation on that to me – it doesn’t immediately make sense as to why something beautiful would evoke a horrified reaction, but that’s the juxtaposition Nisio wrote.

    I’m told the “scars were shared” one is キズを分け合う, which literally is to share scars. I don’t know what that means at a first glance, but then I haven’t seen/read Kizumonogatari.

    For the “unfathomable” one, she says imi wakannai, lit “I don’t understand it / the meaning” (or, one could interpret, “I don’t understand why you’d do that”.) Not “unforgivable”.

    Regarding the yandere thing, I’d have to let the TL explain the reasoning behind that (or I might just add it myself if he tells me).

    A lot of that stuff is pretty legit though and I blame people rushing / being lazy. The kindred pun was all the translator, though.

    • “A monster whose beauty is enough to make the heart stop.” then.
      UTW-Mazui had something about “a tale of shared pain” which isn’t literal garbage.
      Like I said in IRC, choose something that would make sense for her to say. “It boggles the mind!” for example.

      My changes may not make sense when you have the benefit of understanding what the translator originally intended, but if I can’t get that intent from the script, don’t blame me for your muddled translation.

      • Firstly, the intro is supposed to be a recap of sorts and assumes you already have knowledge of the other *monogatari stuff.

        Secondly, you can’t even understand simple dialogue that has no hidden meaning, so this complaint doesn’t mean much coming from you.

        • Is your argument really “our script isn’t bad if you’ve already read the light novels”? You truly are the best, herkz. <3

          • To be fair, this wasn’t even supposed to come out before Kizumonogatari. It was written under the assumption that the viewer had read Kizu, so there will be stuff that probably won’t mean much otherwise.

            The only reason it’s out at all was because Shaft aren’t good at keeping to their targets and didn’t manage to finish the Kizumonogatari movie in time.

  2. Greetings. I come in peace.

    I’m not going to sit here and pretend this release doesn’t have issues. It definitely does, and some of the things you pointed out were legitimate ones. They’ll be fixed in the final release.

    That said, I take exception to some of the so-called problems you had with it, so here I am. Anyway, let’s go:

    1) http://crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/Commie-Nekomonogatari-Black-01-1B0402DF.mkv_snapshot_00.18_2013.01.01_17.41.16.jpg
    I see you suggested “hellishly beautiful” and “heart stop”. Think about this way, though. NisiOisiN could’ve gone with something like that, but he didn’t. Do you know why he chose to go with blood instead? Because the monster in question is a vampire.

    2) http://crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/Commie-Nekomonogatari-Black-01-1B0402DF.mkv_snapshot_00.21_2013.01.01_17.45.16-640×360.jpg
    You don’t need to read the LNs to know that Kizumonogatari is a thing that exists. Do you know what Kizu means? Definitely not pain, that’s for sure.

    3) http://crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/Commie-Nekomonogatari-Black-01-1B0402DF.mkv_snapshot_01.50_2013.01.01_17.56.48-640×360.jpg
    Using “golden nine days” would completely butcher that line, because it talks about how that time period sticks out and makes a not so subtle reference to Golden Week. Last, but not the least, the Japanese says “ougon-iro ni kagayaku”, i.e. it’s a gold-coloured glitter, not a golden one. Now, I’m pretty sure there’s something people say about things that glitter, but I’m having difficulty remembering it.

    4) http://crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/Commie-Nekomonogatari-Black-01-1B0402DF.mkv_snapshot_02.23_2013.01.01_18.03.59.jpg
    >Try “unforgivable”.
    imi wakannai

    5) I know I said I didn’t believe in spelling things out for the viewer, but I’ll do just that for the conversation you posted. Let’s do this.

    >When, and at what stage, did you conclude you were in love with him?
    >Well… I just did, somehow.
    En-dashes aside, this has already been talked about.
    >Yup. Ambiguously. Vaguely.
    As in “I came to that conclusion in an ambiguous and vague manner”.
    >Is that okay?
    As in “Is it okay to make a conclusion that way?”
    >It is.
    As in “It is okay to make a conclusion that way.”

    Now, let’s look at UTW-Mazui’s version which you said were able to follow.
    >When, and what stage did you determine that you loved him?
    >Well, that’s… I just kind of knew.
    >Just kind of knew?
    >Right.
    >Vaguely. Kind of.
    >Just like that?
    >Just like that.
    Yeah, have fun with that.

    6) http://crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/Commie-Nekomonogatari-Black-01-1B0402DF.mkv_snapshot_20.09_2013.01.01_20.37.58-640×360.jpg
    That’s what it says, but I guess we could come up with a way to make it clearer. Definitely not going to change it to something incorrect, though.

    7)>Absolutely brilliant.
    Thank you.

    • Sorry, spam filter hit your post (97.7% accuracy rate, but I gotta watch out for that .3%).

      1. Because vampires could not be described as hellish, and hearts are not related to blood? Okay.

      2. An awkward literal translation however literal is still awkward. “kizu” seems to be a major point of contention, however, so I’ll back off from this a bit and add your viewpoint into the review.

      I still take issue with it, but it’s not going to affect the score.

      3. “Of those nine days that sparkled with the color of gold”. That fine? I think you’ll find my changes more reasonable when I have translator intent down pat. Otherwise I have to guess at what you want.

      4. I don’t speak Jap (or I’m sure I’d have a LOT more to bitch about), so please say that in English, onegaishimasudesu-san.

      5. I understood UTW-Mazui’s just fine. This is my fault for being unclear, but my issue is not with what words are being said, but with how the lines flow from one to the other.

      I think it’s fair to say that -monogatari conversations are like tennis matches. Each side hits the ball at the other and they keep the volley going for a while. What your conversation felt like was each side faulting on the serve. There was no volley; it didn’t fit.

      6. UTW-Mazui had “I couldn’t change a thing and it sucks.” But you might find that too liberal for your translation style.

      “Things don’t go my way” in combination with “Things are much too tedious” is too non-specific for me to suggest a proper line. Is there really no other vocab to work off in the original Japanese?

    • Not really sure. They had “squirming” in the sign translation, so I thought it would have to be along those lines.

      Maybe “creep” would get the meaning across better.

  3. Blood curl? That must be an American thing – I’ve never heard that phrase before. Curdling, yes? But curling? That doesn’t even make sense. Maybe your ancestors misheard the parent language :D

    I’m obviously too dumb for the kindred pun. I’ve looked at it many times and still can’t fathom it.

    Random observation: Those two characters in the bedroom must be tiny. I’m glad they added in a banana for scale, otherwise I would never have known the -gatari franchise was about Borrowers.

    Off to sing “Comma Police” now to the tune of Radiohead.

    • I can’t find any reliable sources for “blood curl”, so it sounds like a veritable mondegreen. I think you’re just over-analysing the kindred thing— kindred contains “red”, which blood is.

      • Oh wow, yes. I was completely over-analysing. It didn’t help that it rhymed with undead either because then I just started playing word association.

  4. Sage, you didn’t even mention Hanekawa’s cat talk.
    It was one thing about their script I really loved.

    Your thoughts on that?

  5. If Commie were attempting to translate “family” into the German language, then they’d have to capitalize “Familie”, since, rule of thumb, all nouns in German need to be capitalized.

    The oh-so-clever way of Commie to translate English words in Japanese Anime into a different language, only succeeds if done right.
    If you don’t know what the fuck you are actually writing into your sub, but still insist on doing so, you are just embarrassing yourself.
    And on top of that, it’s still not funny.

  6. >BS11 airs Nekomonogatari at the same time, but with nearly twice the bitrate as MX
    >Commie uses shitty MX source

    Why would you do that? Because of the “huge station logo”? It’s not that huge compared to western station logos, so nobody actually cares.

  7. I know this is a very long time after the fact, but I just wanted to nitpick one of the screencaps for Commie’s subs: http://crymore.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/Commie-Nekomonogatari-Black-01-1B0402DF.mkv_snapshot_19.45_2013.01.01_20.37.21.jpg

    You need “kindRED” (I used caps because I’m not sure how to do italics in these comment boxes) for the pun to work, but to me it reads awkwardly because it’s the wrong word to begin with. “Kin” is the right one, but then you have no pun. I don’t think it’s a huge issue, but I guess you have to take your pick with this one.

    Also, since I have trouble sometimes with sarcasm in a text-only format, I really couldn’t tell for sure whether or not D_S was being sarcastic in his comments about this particular line (I WANNA say no).

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