Dark_Sage Visits an Anime Bar

Article — By on March 7, 2014 4:30 am

This post was written by Dark_Sage. He is Dark_Sage.

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A way to combine my love of plastic-skinned anime girls with my alcoholism? What could go wrong?


Since work stuck me in Milwaukee for a few months, people (flipr) recommended I should hit up Dick’s Pizza & Pleasure.

I'm taking the high road on this one, but only because any puns I'd use wouldn't be grammatically accurate.

I’m taking the high road on this one, but only because any puns I’d use wouldn’t be grammatically correct.

If the name is familiar, that’s because it’s a bar hyped among the fandom for having an anime theme. If you haven’t heard too much else about it, that’s because it’s in Milwaukee, and nobody gives a shit about Milwaukee (because it sucks).

Here’s the site if you want to see where the interest comes from: http://dickspizza.com/content.html


Entrance/First Floor

I roll up into Dick’s at 6 and find myself faced with an empty restaurant that supposedly opened an hour ago.


The place is a party and a half.

The barkeep looked a little confused as to why I was there, but said he could serve me anyway since they were open. Tried ordering some pizza and got “We don’t start serving food until 6:30.” So I asked if they at least had a happy hour.

“No, but I’ll give you half-off drinks anyway.”



5 minutes of awkward chit-chat later (“So how long has this place been open?”//”I dunno, a while?”) and I was ready to get some pics for this article.

Unfortunately, the lighting combined with my shitty S4 camera didn’t give off the right impression of the fucking awesome gigantic pictures.

Lens flare intentional. Makes it more anime.

Fl1_01 Fl1_02 Fl1_03 Fl1_05

With all the sugoi on the walls, I was excited to see what the bathrooms were like.


Hype hype hype.


Hey, I think I saw this toilet in one of the animes I watched. Sasuga anime bar.

With the first floor as impressive as it was, I thought I’d make my way up to the second. It wasn’t open yet (the party apparently starts at 10:00), but the bartender indulged my curiosity and took me up.


Floor 1.5 (the stairs)


Yes, I took the picture going down the stairs, but for the sake of the narrative, pretend I was going up.


Better shot of Sakura from Naruto, as seen from the steps.


Second Floor


Fuck yeah. That is my jam.

Scoping the place out, I grabbed some more shots. Apparently the place gets packed later at night, so I was pretty psyched to get some images without the contamination of humans.



You may not be able to see it very well, but that’s porn. Dirty 3D porn at that.

Fl2_02 Fl2_03 Fl2_04 Fl2_08

And that finished up the second floor. But tis then I got to thinking.

Scrambled porn on low-quality TVs… shitty art aimed at hipster 90s kids… a sleek design intended for easy clean-up of vomit and blood…

This isn't an anime bar. This is an anime club!

This isn’t an anime bar. This is an anime club!

God fucking dammit.

Memories of college floating back into my head, I hoped I could quell my demons by hitting up the third floor. There’s usually a cover charge to get in there, but bartender-kun obliged me for free since the place was empty.


Third Floor




Yeah, that’s about it. Japan has clouds, so I guess it sorta fits the theme?

A bit disappointed, I headed back down.


Back Down

Saddled back up to the bar and grabbed a shot of the display.


Basketball is my favorite anime.

While enjoying the anime, I ordered an old fashioned and a slice of pizza.


Per Hunta’s request.

I didn’t grab a pic of the pizza, but it was the quality you would expect from food intended to be served solely to drunk people.

Tis then I got to thinking.

Sports on the TVs… only five anime-related things in total… my cab driver laughing at me when I asked to go to Dick’s, telling me that it was a terrible place where only douchebags and slags go to grind on each other while they spend their parents’ money and that it probably wasn’t the place for anyone with fewer than three STDs…

This isn't an anime club. This is a club with anime pics intended solely as a "lol we're so unique" selling point.

This isn’t an anime club. This is just a club with a minimal anime theme to differentiate it from other places and make it seem more hip. I never should have had any expectations for it because the kind of anime-themed bar or club that would interest me would not likely be financially successful in a city as terrible as Milwaukee.

God fucking dammit.

Realization in head, I downed my drink, tipped the barkeep $25, and left.




Can’t say I’d recommend this place if you’re interested in anime. But if you just wanna go for the grinding, head in around 10 and you’ll get what you’re looking for.

Anime cons still (unfortunately) seem like your best bet for socializing with anime fans while being piss-drunk.



SoupRKnowva says:

being piss drunk is my jam

Solaristics says:

>But if you just wanna go for the grinding, head in around 10 and you’ll get what you’re looking for.

Grind on what? Fat chicks that love anime? jkjk.

Ash says:

If it actually had an otaku clientele, I’d estimate the male:female gender ration at 5:1, which is perfect, because the average fat otaku girl is big enough for 5 guys to grind on her simultaneously.

Ash says:

Fuck, I meant ratio, not ration. Although, if the male:female ratio is 5:1, then I guess the guys would really have to “ration out” the girls. So, it wasn’t a typo. I did it on purpose. What? Don’t look at me like that.

Dark_Sage says:

It’d probably be more even. Male otaku aren’t exactly the social types, so even if there were an anime-themed club, they wouldn’t go. Cons are pretty even in the gender split too, though I’d say on average there are more girls than guys.

fohfuu says:

In mother UK, there are about twice as many buying female buying anime/manga fans as the US.
They are as bad as you imagine.

tenryuu a shit says:

>my cab driver laughing at me when I asked to go to Dick’s, telling me that it was a terrible place where only douchebags and slags

Was your cab driver British?

Dark_Sage says:

Yes. Though I hear they prefer the term aesthetically-impaired.

Velorien says:

Just because someone should say it: that’s not Sakura from Naruto.

Calyrica says:

It’s Mamiina from Simoun.

TouToTheHouYo says:

Your taste in 2hu’s is impeccable.

Dark_Sage says:

It’s hard to not like the strongest.

shcboomer says:

So much for an anime themed club… Sasuga D_S.

Hunta says:

How was the old-fashioned? And/or how much did the bartender’s eyes bug out when you ordered it?

Dark_Sage says:

What? Please don’t tell me you think it’s an obscure drink. Every bartender knows how to make it.

To your other question it was okay enough.

shcboomer says:

How could a bartender screw it up?

Hunta says:

It’s not so much that it’s (not) obscure, it’s more that (at least in New England) it really isn’t ordered very often. Or at all, according to some bartenders.

Maybe I just live in bizzaro land though.

flipr says:

it seems to be more common in the northern midwest (or at least wisconsin). there are several bars around me that pride themselves on having the “best” old fashioned.

Hunta says:

Suddenly, a reason to visit the northern midwest (or at least wisconsin.)

Ren says:

WTF? Where the pictures of the hot Japanese chicks? Like I give a fuck about 3D porn.

NexXKinn says:

D_S, is it a bit awkward walking around that bar alone?

Dark_Sage says:

I wasn’t alone. I had you all… in my heart. <3

shcboomer says:

I’m guessing the answer was yes.

TouToTheHouYo says:

We’re a pretty awkward bunch, we are.

flipr says:

This is so unfortunate — I had high hopes for the place. Thanks for being a bro and checking it out.


>, tipped the barkeep $25

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