Anime North 2014: Canadaconpartytime

Conventions — By on May 21, 2014 8:40 pm

This post was written by Dark_Sage. He is Dark_Sage.

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If you’re going to Anime North to enjoy the con itself, you’re going for the wrong reason. Go for the me that’s going for you.


Guest List (I really should confirm these names):


  • Switches (fansubber)
  • Joey (aniblogger)
  • Denpa (fansubber)
  • Half of Doki’s staff, including:
    • Aieon
    • jakeman95
    • rarely_upset
    • TheThing
  • Ash (yes, the one from Pokemon)
  • CureHarmony (likes little girls)
  • Jenny (enjoys oranges)
  • Jenny’s nakama-chan (is Jenny’s nakama-chan)
  • Other people who told me they were going but whose names I completely and utterly forgot.
  • You?
It'll be a blast

You should come. It’ll be a blast.


Why the con itself is going to be less than amazing

Per the guidebook app, you’re gonna need a time machine to navigate the con.

Anime North Guidebook


It’s Canada, so there’s gonna be Québécois there.


“Look at me. I’m so rebellious that I only speak shitty languages and refuse to brush my teeth anytime ever.”


Rob Ford’s in rehab, so he won’t be partying with us.




Last year I had to sign so many tongues with my own that I got a tongue cramp. Ugh.

Eh, whatcha gonna do?

The things I do for you people~



So yeah, contact me via the regular channels if you’re going and wanna hang out. I’m flying in Thursday and flying out Monday, so I should be pretty available. Unless you’re boring, that is.

Twitter: @feedmeyourtears

Email: memail

Or post here.



Oh, and I have extra tix for Friday and Saturday. You can have them in exchange for a blowjob and/or a high five. Lemme know if you’re interested.

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puddi says:


oh boy

Dark_Sage says:

I think there was a Commie dev who was going to AN. Perhaps I should introduce them to each other.

Joji says:

I did nothing wrong my friend. Why you hating me for?

Humanity says:

Can’t wait for all the con posts!

shcboomer says:

Looking forward to con posts as well. They’re always entertaining.

Justinnnnnn says:

Wait, I don’t see Xythar in that list yo! Those cons need more kangaroos and koalas y’know!

Anonymous says:

The last thing that con needs is another bogan-ass bogan ass.

Xythar says:

The last anime con I went to was in 2005. That was enough.

Renderer says:

Yea I think you should go. Maybe if you meet D_S you’ll see how your fake subbing and other of your recent immoral actives, such as riding Commie’s Cock, and creating Eotens is killing the world of fan subbing and anime itself.


I’m going to tell you guys a true story. My friend went to his first anime con the other day, but when I called to see how it went, his parents said he didn’t come home after it was over. A few days later I heard he was in the hospital with 3 broken ribs, a broken leg, and a Boku no pico manga impaled in his skull.

I called him out of worry and this is the conversation that took place:


Friend: “Yea, a bunch of cos players, Trannys, and a guy in a giant dick costume beat the shit out of me”.


Friend: “No! Remember Goku said not to use your power on humans”!

Me: “Yea you’re right, I was out of line, sorry”. Anyways why did those assholes rap- I mean jump you”?

Friend: “I don’t know! All I did was ask them where the restroom was, then they said “hey it’s pretty hot bro, you should take off your jacket”. “Then as soon as I took of my jacket the guy in the giant dick costume screamed at the top of his voice and said: “TAKE FROM HIM EVERYTHING AND GIVE HIM DIC-, I MEAN NOTHING”!! “And I think you can figure out what happened after that”. “I feel so violated”.

Me: “Wow,that’s aweso-, terrible. But if they attacked you as soon as you took off your jacket, that means your shirt was the reason they did it”. “So let me ask you what kind of shirt was it, and was there anything in particular written on your shirt”?

Friend: Nice deduction skills but you’re wrong, my shirt was way too awesome and BAD ASS for ANYONE to hate it. I was wearing a tight V- neck shirt with “I AM THE ALMIGHTY XYTHAR” written on the front and back.

Me:”………… wha… I… uhh…..sigh…..” *Hangs up phone.

Xythar says:

Trying too hard, dude.

Renderer says:

I always try hard for my friends, and I never ask for anything in return. UNLIKE YOU!

I recorded a conversation in IRC that took place in a secret chat room. This is what was said there:

Commie: “Come on bro help us out aren’t we friends MAAAAAAAN”?

Xythar: “Yea we are friends aren’t we? But this is still a give and take relationship in my eyes”.

Commie: “OHHHHH! I know what you like you want some of that good o’l Commie dick”.

Xythar: *Blushes “No I would never do something like that KONO HENTAI”!!

Commie: “Come on don’t go all tsundere on me. Come on remember your face how it was in complete bliss as your rode this good o’l commie cock. Come back to us Xythar nobody can QC/TLC my balls like you do”.

Xythar: “YOU ECCHI! BAKA BAKA BAKA BAKA!! I’m leaving”!

Yes this was a very disturbing conversation indeed. Well this is solid proof that Xythar and Commie are involved in a giant scandal. To trick us for donations and more downloads. smh

FalseDawn says:

When did Crymore become a 4chan offshoot? :S

addityo says:

hey renderer-kun-tan-sama-chan

Rock96 says:

…I see what you did there.

Justinnnnnn says:

He so mad.

Dark_Sage says:

Seriously. Renderer, cut it out with the reddit shit. It’s a bit tired by this point.

Googol says:

Man, you’re so passionate in telling us how they beat crap out of you. Next time be careful, ok?

Justinnnnnn says:

Anon, is that you Renderer?

Xythar, I think you should take that plane. Something tells me you and D_S would pick flowers and laugh together all day long as best friend

Justinnnnnn says:

best fwends 4 life* (づ。◕‿‿◕。)づ

Renderer says:

Please!! I know you guys hate me but please check out my best friend’s anime review. He needs some more views on YouTube to pay for his mom’s cancer.

Why does he need to pay for the cancer?

Justinnnnnn says:

You made me laugh a lot, thank you.

rarely_upset says:

I haven’t been Doki staff since oregairu, though I suppose Oni still is hosted by Doki.

On another note, denpa was completely blown away after being graced by Dark_Sage’s presence and I’m sure anyone that decides to come will have a similarly pleasant experience. 3 thumbs out of 5 stars.

rarely_upset says:

I’m not anything staff ;w;

Dark_Sage says:

I can also confirm that rarely is fit to wear his “I am Dark_Sage t-shirt”. He may not be quite as kawaii as me, but he comes close. 10/10. Would do what we did last night again.

rarely_upset says: #selfie #nofilter #AN2014 #LookingGood

You wouldn’t believe the number of people just flinging themselves at me yesterday.

Humanity says:

Nice touch with the M.

Dark_Sage says:

I had to stop myself when I realized rarely wasn’t me.

Triskelion says:

I’ll be going, but I’m a pretty boring person.

Dark_Sage says:

Oh yeah, you were in the IRC room. Catch ya sometime this weekend for sure. And don’t worry, I’ve got enough saginess available that I’ll let you borrow some.

Triskelion says:

Wait what? I don’t remember being in the IRC room.

Dark_Sage says:

Aren’t you kevi8991?

Triskelion says:

Nope, lol. I’m Triskelion on irc

Dark_Sage says:

Oh, well email me or come on my channel (#whine-subs on Rizon) or something. We should hang.

EndlessExcel says:

>Go for the me that’s going for you.

I see what you did there.

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