No, I haven’t fansubbed in years, and I’m not about to start for Aho Girl

Article — By on July 8, 2017 12:39 am

This post was written by Dark_Sage. He is Dark_Sage.

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After noticing a “Dark-Sage” branded torrent achieved 13 full downloads on nyaaC I knew I had to chime in. Got a reputation to maintain, after all!


Those of you paying attention to the extremely relevant fansubbing scene may have noticed a recent, trending torrent on a popular Nyaa emulation site, bearing my glorious moniker:

But it is with heavy heart that I must inform you this is in fact a falsehood, perpetrated upon your innocence by knaves of a most foul kind. Indeed, I fear ’tis the dreaded [fansub cartel] responsible for this affront upon your anime chastity. As they are, of course, the masterminds behind every retarded fuckpuppet the scene has limply dangled toward us since 2011.

This is a picture of Revy-chan, a top-tier waifu and entirely unrelated to this filler article.


Necessarily, this is cause for concern (hence the post). Dealing with the only people currently calling themselves scenekin — a bunch of posers who had no part in establishing a scene they’ve been so desperately apeing this past decade — is of 0 interest to me. But preserving the innocence of my consummate character? Why the half-a-handle of vodka in me almost demands an urgent response (10 minutes or less? criterion: met).

And that response?

  • No I am not fansubbing anything this season
  • No I will not be fansubbing anything new within either of our lifetimes
  • No I will not have sex with you or your boyfriend’s girlfriend


With that, I should mention I have another palace in P5 to run, so I absolutely must be off now. (I heard Kawakami won’t give my asshole a tonguebath unless I’m lv. 100, so I’ve got a grind to go.)

The only woman worth marrying. No asterisks needed.

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HeavenlyArmed says:

Huh, Kawakami seems more sober than I’d expect from you, but besides that it doesn’t surprise me much that you’d go for her.

NoctisCuadro says:

Really? Kawakami? I expected more from you.
Takemi best girl.

Dark_Sage says:

If you said headphones or sweatertits, I’d have given you benefit of the doubt since I haven’t gotten far enough to meet them yet. But Takemi? I’m not saying I wouldn’t, but unless her arc wraps up with her fucking dead people, she’s way too one-note for my cultured standards.

Shimi says:

I at least prefer this over DS that run a blog that does absolutely nothing ;D

Don’t hurt the new Boruto generations!

anony says:

>No I will not have sex with you or your boyfriend’s girlfriend
Even if I cosplay as a character of your choice, and make at least passable effort to act as well?

Dark_Sage says:

Look, I was drunk when I wrote that and may not have meant everything I said. Maybe we can give this a chance after all. (Yuno btw. I pick Yuno.)

ame (required): says:

Can you start with your summer 2017 article already? I might actually read it this time.

JoeSchmoe says:

Well if you’re not fansubbing, maybe you should go help Netflix stream more anime legally

On second thought, looking at the qualifications, maybe not :P

Dark_Sage says:

Maybe I could pull a Funimation and have my uncle negotiate all my deals for me.

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