So, I wonder how much I liked Ohayocon.
Day 0 – Thursday
Rolled into Columbus at 10 PM. Met up with Soup and we headed over to the hotel. The lady who checked us in asked if we wanted to stay on a quiet floor or a party floor.
We did early check-in for the con and saw some other nerds drinking in the bar once we got our badges. Then we went to sleep without talking to any of them, mostly because they were really fucking weird.
Day 1 – Friday
Friday, best day (of ANY con).
11:00 Chipotle for breakfast. Of course.
12:00 Best Anime You’ve Never Heard Of panel. We hoped this wasn’t gonna be done by the moron who put “Hen Zemi” in last year.
Luckily, it wasn’t. It was just done by a panel of four people, of whom only one ever said anything. So, what were these amazing anime?
Yup, that was it. Apparently I was only one of a few in the room to have actually heard of all those, so I guess I’m just way2anime4cons.
1:00 Fate/Stay Night. This was a pretty decent panel. It was informative, so it’d be boring to summarize.
Uhh, we talked about how Heaven’s Feel is apparently the greatest thing ever at least. Haven’t played the VNs, but anything that puts Bugs-in-her-vagina-chan in the spotlight has to be good.
2:30 Hit up the Guy’s Guide to Girls’ Anime panel. This panel was purportedly about all the best shoujo anime for men, but it was more of a “One Guy’s Guide to a Few Shoujos He Watched Once, Sort Of” panel. Like this guy’s last panel (BAYNHO), it had multiple panelists but he was the only one who talked.
??? – I dunno, can’t remember this one.
Ouran High School Host Club.
The final shoujo here? Madoka Magica. Yes, really. Not only was that the easiest cop-out ever (hey guys, did you know Eva is a good mecha anime?), but the show can hardly be considered shoujo — the target audience was not 13-year-old girls. If you’re gonna label it with one of the “four” (shounen, shoujo, josei, seinen), it would be seinen.
Soup, uhh, didn’t take too kindly to the designation of Magica as shoujo, and pretty much called the presenter retarded. To which the presenter retorted “Are you running a panel? Cuz I don’t think you’re running a panel.” (Mad! Mad! Mad!)
After a bit, the dude calmed down and apologized for overreacting, to which Soup only responded “You’re still wrong.”
4:00 Underrated Series panel? Inaccurate. Try “Best shows that only forty-year-olds would like”.
- Cromartie High School. (You know why nobody talks about this show anymore? It’s because no one ever actually liked it. It’s just one of those “cool to like” shows that fades into obscurity because it’s not actually as good as it was hyped up to be. HOW IRONIC)
- Hajime no Ippo.
- Sexy Commando.
- Gunbuster. (They went on and on about how this anime would “literally change your life”. Too bad it fucking sucked.)
- Monster. (74 episodes of boring with an ending that brings it back to the first episode. Amazing.)
- Princess Tutu. (Soooo underrated.)
If you’ve seen all of these, you’re too old to ogle the cosplay pics I’m gonna post later. I’m sorry, but them’s the rules.
5:00 Opening ceremonies! Ahahaha — no, fuck that. Dinnertime.
It was at this point we found out the Chipotle by the convention center closes at 4:00. Fuck everything. Subway instead, I guess.
5:45 We were in the elevator heading up to our rooms when Soup started talking about press badges once he noticed the other guy in our elevator had one. After a bit of tongue flappery, the guy was like “Do you give good press?” and I was like “lolol no, I say everything sucks.” So he gave me his business card.
~Guess I’m obligated to go to Youmacon now.~
7:00 AMV Contest. The line was insane for this showing in the smallest room they could find because apparently no one thought AMVs would be a big draw at the con. Most of them sucked. Except one. That Toradora x Ano Hana (Ship between Menma and Taiga) was fucking weird, but goddamn impressive.
9:00 Spike Spencer’s stupid shit. I dunno, we didn’t really have anything else to do so we thought we’d see what this panel is like. Because I’m not a virgin, I don’t really follow American seiyuu-kuns, so I didn’t know who this jerkoff was until people in the line explained it to me.
Then some guy ahead of us in line saw my “Dark_Sage” name badge and told me my Hyobu jokesubs suck. ;_; (I wouldn’t watch them myself, so whatever. Valid diss.)
9:12 Left Spike Spencer’s stupid shit. Goddamn this guy was more full of himself than I am. He spent the entire time we were there “acting” (read: smiling stupidly and pretending he was a baby) and trying to do accents or something. Apparently he thought this was still 1998 and he was still relevant.
We were the first to ditch, and I hoped he would call us out because I had a few “The 90s called and they want their AIDS back” comments loaded up. Unfortunately he was too far up his own ass to see us leave. It can’t be helped.
9:35 Left the rave.
We’re not in middle school anymore.
???-??? I dunno. Apparently we went to karaoke. I seriously cannot remember this part even though I took videos of the singers (which I have since deleted because apparently I can’t film while drunk).
This is probably the part where that one guy kissed me too (I don’t blame him; I’d fall for me too). Dunno what else happened because I really don’t remember much about this part of the night.
12:30 “You Have Died of Dysentary” panel — basically it was an Oregon Trail playthrough where the decisions were made by majority vote. And everyone was completely fucking out of their minds (this is why Fridays are the best).
Soup was hitting on a Panty cosplayer while her friend was up as a participant in the “game”. I remember him constantly telling me to shut up so I guess I may have ruined our odds here. Note to self: Be slightly less drunk next time.
2:15 The guy from three previous panels we went to before (including the shoujo one) came up to us and thanked us for coming to each of his panels even if we were obnoxious cunts in each. He and Soup hugged (there might have been tongue there, but I’m not sure) and everything was smoothed over. @masterewok #heartwrenchingyoloswag
2:30 Panty and Stocking panel. We went cuz of the chicks from before, but it sucked, so we left and went to sleep.
Onto Day 2! …whenever I finish writing it.