Fansub Review: [Commie] Tsuritama (Episode 02)

This post was written by Dark_Sage. He is Dark_Sage.

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Because they’re both using the same base script, expect similar errors.

Release format: MKV (195 MB, 10-bit)

Japanesiness: No honorifics. “Onii-chan” translated to the person-in-question’s first name.

English style: American English.

Group website: http://commiesubs.com/

Encoding details: http://pastebin.com/6kzqF88w

8thsin’s translation critique: N/A

Ji-hi’s screenshot comparisons: N/A

 

Table of Contents

Visual Quality

Script Quality

Timing

Results

Visual Quality

Karaoke.

Opening. Sad. Very sad. I’m not a big fan of fonts that are hard to read. Alternating capital letters along with Hideous_Blue isn’t a good idea.

Ending. More ugly blue. I get that the show is centered around water, but I do like to read my karaoke.

 

Typesetting.

Commie opted for a bolder style here. I think it fits the mood better than WhyNot’s lighter-style script. Does it really matter… at all? Nope. But fuck you, I’m pointing it out anyway.

Unlike a lot of the signs (which go untypeset here) in this show, this one deserves a typeset because the show focuses on the screen for a good amount of time, drawing it to the viewer’s attention as important.

Overall, I can’t say that the typesetting is going to make or break either group’s release.

Script Quality

Karaoke.

I don’t care about anything else.
Without realizing it, I was waiting here for you.
I want to leave my shyness behind.
I can’t decide whether to feel happy or sad.

I don’t really care about anything else
and I was waiting for you here before I knew it
I left my shyness behind
Does that make you feel happy or sad?

Both of these seem similar at the outset, but they’re really not. Perhaps someone more familiar with the translations will be interested in jumping down my throat, but speaking from the perspective of a regular guy, one of these sounds a lot worse than the other.

“I don’t really care about anything else and I was waiting for you here before I knew it” does not make sense. “I was waiting for you here and I don’t really care about anything else” doesn’t make sense as a single thought, but it makes perfect sense as two separate thoughts.

“I want to leave my shyness behind but I can’t decide whether to feel happy or sad.” <- Makes sense.

“I’m not shy anymore, so does that make you feel happy or sad?” <- WTF?

WhyNot’s is the first one and Commie’s is the second.

I’m not particularly enamored of their phrasing here, but I will say that the song generally made sense. I like it when songs make sense. I’m bringing this up because WhyNot’s did NOT make sense, which I’ll talk about in their review. (Do ya like how I’m forcing you into that review to get the whole picture? I’m so… uhh, I lost my train of thought. Onto the script.)

 

Main Script.

“Hey everyone, look, it’s the… uh… the demon-mask face…”

“The alien and the demon-face?”

Ooh, opportunity. anymore vs. any more. Which is preferable? In British English, there isn’t any room for “anymore”. It’s pretty much considered non-canon. In American English, “anymore” tends to be preferred (at least in non-standard use. YMMV for academic texts). I’m not going to call this an error because it’s not (more of a preference, really). Just thought it was interesting to point out.

I watched both Commie’s release and WhyNot’s before writing these reviews and would like to point to this example as the primary reason why I will be recommending Commie’s release over WhyNot’s.

The gist of her character is that she speaks… oddly. Demon-face points this out at 4:03 in every release out there (WhyNot/Commie/CR) when he says “Her accent’s ridiculous.”

Here, we can definitely see that she’s speaking with an accent. Her lines read differently from the other characters, and her voice actress speaks with an accent too, slurring specific words. Commie reflects this with their script. WhyNot doesn’t. The only way you can tell that she’s speaking any differently is by paying close attention to how her voice actress speaks.

When Demonbro says “Her accent’s ridiculous.” at 4:03 in WhyNot’s release (and CR’s too, to be fair), the audience doesn’t really understand why he’d say that. This is important because it’s leaving out one of her character traits when it’s so easy to reflect her uniqueness in the script.

They don’t have problems using ?! elsewhere in the script, so it looks like this was just a mistake (that is, using an exclamation mark at the end of a question).

“Wait. You’re going too fast.”

The original line does get the point across, but it does so awkwardly. It’s not the explanation that’s too fast; it’s the pace at which he’s explaining.

“Hey Haru, why d’ya like that there Yuki kid?”

or

“Hey Bro, why d’ya like that there Yuki kid?”

According to the story, they’re siblings. It makes sense for “Bro” to be capitalized in this sense.

What the fuck? This translation is ten kinds of retarded. WhyNot made the right choice with “Is something wrong with this place?”

 

Timing Review

Incoming. When “Timing Critique” is added as a category, you’ll know this part is done.

Results.

Watchability: Watchable.

Timing Grade: 

Visual grade: C

Script grade: B

Overall grade (timing results not factored in): B-

I’m going to recommend Commie’s release over WhyNot’s pretty much just for the accent issue. Ignoring that, both releases are pretty close in terms of quality.

0 thoughts on “Fansub Review: [Commie] Tsuritama (Episode 02)”

  1. “Onii-chan” translated to the person-in-question’s first name.”. I wish fansub groups would stop doing this. It doesn’t work. Just use the fucking honourifics for Christ’s sake. Everyone knows what they mean by now.

    Reply
    • Sorry, at Commie we translate Japanese into English. You’re welcome to watch another group or download the raws if you disagree.

      Reply
      • Except he wasn’t calling you out on not translating into English. He was calling you out on your translation practices.

        Reply
          • That’s not what I was getting at. Honourifics and the like play an important part in Japanese relationships. Translating them to English doesn’t really get the same point across, in my opinion. And using someone’s name in place of the honourific seems… pretty awkward. What’s wrong with using Senpai or Onii-chan? Maybe just have a translator’s note in there or… something. I dunno.

            (And btw, I’m a girl. Not that it matters really.)

            Reply
            • Sorry, but that’s not the way we do things. I apologise for not going into further detail, but I’ve seen this argument play out countless times before and neither side ever manages to convince the other, so it’s really not worth having. There are plenty of sub groups that still use honorifics etc. if that’s your preference.

              Reply
            • Fair enough. I wasn’t trying to go after Commie in particular, I was just saying that it annoyed me. Sorry for coming across the wrong way.

              Reply
            • I’ve used honorifics in every single release I’ve translated. To be quite honest, 99% of the time it doesn’t matter.
               
              That being said, I’m not a fan of the strict, black-and-white standards that some groups seem to use, which demand style decisions that may not be appropriate for the show in question.
               
              If you want to localize more, great– but localize to get the meaning across, don’t localize for the sake of localization. Conversely, if you want to localize less, great– but don’t bombard your viewers with unnecessary explanations or confusing and unfamiliar references.
               
              $0.02

              Reply
            • @Starra
              Used to think the same way, but reading so many editing and TL critiques led me to change my mind. If “onii-chan” is localized in subs, my ears would never miss the “true term” anyway because it’s such a familiar one. This is why I’m starting not to care about honorifics as well.

              I’d guess onii-chan -> character name comes from the fact that siblings in English-speaking countries actually call each other by first name.

              Reply
            • Honorifics can be localized pretty easily most of the time without losing any meaning, as long as the people doing the localization know what they’re doing and speak actual English. Honorifics rarely add anything of value if the group is competent.

              I personally don’t care whether a group uses honorifics or not. As long as you’re intelligent and consistent in your policy, like lyger said, it really doesn’t make much difference.

              Reply

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