Fansub Review: [Commie] Love Lab (Episode 09)

This post was written by Dark_Sage. He is Dark_Sage.

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Geez, Commie, I hope your editor washed his hands after taking a shit all over this script.

Table of Contents

Release Information

Visual Quality

Script Quality

Results

 

Release Information

Episode details.

Release format: MKV (242 MB, 10-bit)

Japanesiness: No honorifics.

English style: American English.

Encoding detailshttp://pastebin.com/PAhT1BFT

Speed: Quick (<48 hours)

 

External links.

Group website: http://commiesubs.com/

IRC channel: #[email protected]

 

 

Visual Review

Karaoke.

[Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_02.03_[2013.09.14_21.26.36] [Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_02.18_[2013.09.14_21.27.05]

Opening. They went with… pink that wasn’t the color of pink in the OP… Okay, sure, whatever. Then try picking a color that doesn’t give me a fucking headache when reading it. They made the OP’s credits dark for a reason, dipshits.

Rating: Okay-.

[Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_22.43_[2013.09.17_22.51.19] [Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_22.53_[2013.09.17_22.48.12]

Ending. There was absolutely no thematic basis behind the coloring and the font. Nor was it even placed well. Laziness crossed with incompetence is not a good combination.

Rating: Bad.

 

 

Typesetting.

[Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_00.13_[2013.09.14_21.23.53] [Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_00.16_[2013.09.14_21.24.03]

[Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_00.30_[2013.09.14_21.24.30] [Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_00.43_[2013.09.14_21.24.59]

[Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_02.37_[2013.09.14_21.36.11] [Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_04.40_[2013.09.14_21.38.54] [Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_11.03_[2013.09.14_21.49.56][Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_12.46_[2013.09.17_22.31.50] [Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_13.03_[2013.09.17_22.32.13] [Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_13.21_[2013.09.17_22.32.34] [Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_14.08_[2013.09.17_22.35.02] [Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_14.10_[2013.09.17_22.35.08] [Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_14.14_[2013.09.17_22.35.15] [Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_14.31_[2013.09.17_22.35.37] [Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_18.02_[2013.09.17_22.40.11] [Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_18.26_[2013.09.17_22.40.42] [Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_18.39_[2013.09.17_22.41.00] [Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_19.56_[2013.09.17_22.42.34] [Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_23.57_[2013.09.17_22.52.56] [Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_24.08_[2013.09.17_22.55.09]

The typesetting is generally fine, but you’d think they’d standardize how they handle those arrow signs.

 

 

 

Script Review

Main Script.

[Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_00.03_[2013.09.20_02.45.42]

[Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_00.05_[2013.09.14_21.23.00]

They weren’t on a speed date, Commie.

[Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_00.16_[2013.09.20_02.46.31]

That’s generally what the idiom means, yes. This is the equivalent of saying “Don’t count your chickens before they hatch. You shouldn’t plan on something good happening before it’s happened because there’s always the chance that it won’t happen.”

[Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_00.20_[2013.09.20_02.48.45]

“Anyway” would make sense as a transition if they weren’t already talking about Sayo. Since they were, it’s out of place.

“Geez, Sayo sure is taking her time.” would work better.

[Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_12.28_[2013.09.17_22.31.22]

[Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_15.07_[2013.09.20_03.30.06]

[Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_16.04_[2013.09.20_03.32.05]

[Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_00.34_[2013.09.20_02.50.37]

[Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_18.39_[2013.09.17_22.41.00]

[Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_19.43_[2013.09.20_03.38.11]

I’d me

but

this is your you

Sage advice™. Follow it. You’re welcome.

[Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_02.37_[2013.09.20_02.51.51]

You’d have to use a very literal interpretation of “red-handed” for this to work.

Ichikawa took a picture and the picture got Sayo in trouble. It would be more accurate for this to be “Ichikawa caught me red-handed with a picture.” Or you could just, y’know, stop trying to use one of the five of the idioms you kinda sorta know and go with something else. That’s also an option.

[Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_02.41_[2013.09.20_02.54.35] [Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_02.46_[2013.09.20_02.54.45]

These don’t match. Please tell me you were only pretending, Commie. Please. ;_;

[Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_03.23_[2013.09.20_02.56.18] [Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_03.24_[2013.09.20_02.56.23]

“Wish”? Why would you use that word? Her being an oujo-sama doesn’t mean she’s going to use out-of-place words. Rather, it would be the opposite; she’s supposed to speak properly.

Change it to “sincerely desire” or something that would fit how you’ve characterized her so far. I’d personally skip this line in favor of other characterization opportunities and use a “really want” here.

[Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_05.36_[2013.09.20_02.57.45] [Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_05.37_[2013.09.20_02.57.50]

Did you know? “Did you know?” does not work as a full sentence in English — conversational or otherwise.

[Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_05.48_[2013.09.20_03.00.28]

You’re not emphasizing your points with writing like this; you’re just being redundant.

[Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_07.13_[2013.09.20_03.02.58] [Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_07.16_[2013.09.20_03.03.05]

[Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_07.28_[2013.09.20_03.05.19]

That’s not what a motion is. You’re thinking of a campaign or something. A motion in this sense would be something she’d propose to the council (meaning the thoughts of the student body would be largely irrelevant, especially since her fellow council members are all with her on this).

[Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_08.04_[2013.09.20_03.06.03]

Use a fucking semicolon instead of a period, then. I would also accept a comma even though that would technically be a comma splice.

“I get hungry; I eat. Cause and effect.”

[Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_09.56_[2013.09.20_03.08.03]

“badly” can mean “much”, but it needs to be in a sentence where it can’t be interpreted otherwise. If you take “badly” as an adjective for how she’s crying, then it ruins the scene. And “If you cry that much,” isn’t even a good line. Try, “If you keep crying like that,”

[Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_10.26_[2013.09.20_03.10.21] [Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_10.31_[2013.09.20_03.11.12] [Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_10.33_[2013.09.20_03.11.17]

You can’t even handle the burn right?

“I don’t think her glasses have anything to do with that.” is the sentence you need for the diss the script comments indicate you were so proud of.

[Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_10.35_[2013.09.20_03.12.01] [Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_10.38_[2013.09.20_03.12.08]

That is what the idiom fucking means. Why are you doing this to me?

[Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_11.21_[2013.09.20_03.13.35]

“officially going to decide” and “going to officially decide” don’t mean the same thing.

[Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_13.37_[2013.09.20_03.17.19] [Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_13.39_[2013.09.20_03.17.24] [Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_13.41_[2013.09.20_03.17.29][Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_13.42_[2013.09.20_03.18.21]

This is a very good example of the kind of English you’ll be forced to endure with this release.

1. Stilted. Phrasing. (Especially lines 3 and 4. )

2. Weird question-response management. (Lines 1 and 2. You’d want to use “C-Correct!”)

3. An inability to segue lines together. (Line 3 is the most out of place. A simple “was just” would have fixed it.)

4. Confused word use. (Line 4. FFF used “good-looking” which makes Makio’s entrance in the next frame more entertaining — since omigosh the boy was a girl! “Cool” does nothing.)

[Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_13.49_[2013.09.17_22.34.40]

Oh Commie, who else would I talking about?

[Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_16.23_[2013.09.20_03.33.17]

Why the fuck would you use the word “links”? Why would you even put the sentence in the situation where it would seem like a good idea to use that vocab word that you clearly don’t know how to use? Fucking hell, Commie v1.

“But none of us know any boys,”

[Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_17.58_[2013.09.17_22.39.23]

Get it, guys? It’s funny because Commie is le joking around. They don’t take themselves too seriously, which means you can trust them to be cool kids who don’t play by no rules.

I bet you wanna be like them when you grow up. Sandwich artiste is a respectable position!

[Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_18.45_[2013.09.20_03.36.47]

No no no.

It would be “I’d like it if you didn’t look down on me.” if anything. I’d rather rephrase this to “I’d rather you not underestimate me.”

[Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_19.56_[2013.09.20_03.40.36]

That’s not a lunch box.

[Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_20.43_[2013.09.17_22.43.34]

…What in the legitimate what?

That’s not the idiom. “the real deal” only works with the. Otherwise you’re referring to a bargain.

[Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_21.56_[2013.09.17_22.45.01]

“Man, today was tiring.”

Commie, what is this? This script is fucked six ways from Sunday and it’s supposed to be one of your better ones. Did all your decent staff leave for Vivid or something?

[Commie] Love Lab - 09 [18968622].mkv_snapshot_24.08_[2013.09.17_22.54.32]

I skipped a few episodes for this review. Please tell me this actually makes sense. I’m operating under the assumption it does, because the alternative is to lose all faith in humanity.

 

 

 

Results

Watchability: Watchable.

Visual grade: B-

Script grade: D+

Overall grade: C-

This script is just not good. I hope to the hope pope that I don’t have to recommend this shit to anyone. FFF and HorribleSubs… you’re the only ones left I can put any faith in. Try not to let me down.

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38 thoughts on “Fansub Review: [Commie] Love Lab (Episode 09)”

    • I regain it every time I get my daily doses of coffee and/or carbonated poison.

      I always find some way to lose it before the caffeine wears off, though.

      Reply
    • I thought a comma splice fit in more with how she phrased it — one of the examples where bad grammar isn’t necessarily bad writing. But your point is valid as well. I will update that section accordingly.

      Reply
    • Pssh, I’d rather add “When” to the start (and use comma) than use a semicolon.

      That said, stringing together short and related sentences with commas is pretty accepted.

      Reply
        • Since when was D_S’s taste a factor for deciding whether you watch something or not?
          He almost (almost) convinced me not to watch Space Bros. I only started watching it this summer, since other people were saying lots of good stuff about it.
          Try the 1st episode of Love Lab. I like it a lot, personally, since it made me laugh out loud a couple of times, something not a lot of anime are able to do.

          Reply
            • You’re also slightly missing the point if you want to compare those two. Elfen Lied is a good representation of the guro genre. Monster is a bad representation of the psychological drama genre (whereas Ergo Proxy is a good one if you want a point of comparison). When I rate things, I judge them based off what they set out to do and rate them on how much enjoyment they gave me. That’s about it.

              So while you bitch about how I only like shows for blood and gore, you’re missing the point that that is indeed why I like shows about blood and gore. I also like romcoms for their romantic comedy. And by the gods I like sports shows for how the characters deal with their sports of choice.

              Whine all you like about how I don’t circlejerk with everyone else over what series are considered “good” and “bad”. I’m not going to apologize for having a personality or the ability to think for myself.

              Reply

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